* // My black past || starting afresh `

2006-08-18T06:56:00.000-07:00

Is it ppl's curiousity ah??when some one seems like he doesn get angry..some sadistic nature one has tt he just want to see how he looks when he really lose control..

Ok...sorry but these days i am not in a very nice mood...so...fuckers..listen up...dun think i dunno who you are...it's as clear as i am seeing u through a glass as u happily make comments like some 13 14 year old trying to act mature...

If u wan to handle it the mature way..fine let me analyse for you this...first..this thing is over...i dun care how hypocritical u can be in front of me..dun think i can't feel a shit..second...though some ppl have heard of the issue...it's not like every one know about it and every one is talking about it and every one comes and comment..ONLY YOU THESE FEW PEOPLE...and 3rd ly..i know annonymous you feel unsettled...and make such comments..and i dunno why...you made the next 2...and that me...you are the friend..helping your friend out i dun care...but please..if u really think u are mature...b4 u really do..think of the situation around..is it still such a hot topic???is it true that really a lot ppl know about it???

lastly...not every one in the school knows my age..and those tt do...are the people i know...and i normally personally tell them OR..physically present when they got to know from ppl...SO DUN YOU PRETEND I DUNNO WHO U ARE...and u can of course say i put my bday on the blog wad...please lar...use some common sense can??who read's ppl's blog actually go look at thos things??and pay attention to the DOB and bother to calculate...IF YOU DID..CONGRATES...U SURE LIVE UP TO UR NAME TO BE 100% LIFELESS LOSERS!!

So 2 of your..shut up b4 I really flare up one in front of you all..GROW UP AND LEARN TO MOVE ON!!!!NOT SAY I NEVER ADMITTED BEING WRONG BUT HAVE YOU!?all you know is complain and be hypocritical..what else??Get a life...YOUR OWN LIFE!!and get ur hands OFF MINE

2006-08-16T07:54:00.000-07:00

Sick...there it goes again..anonymous tagger... whatever man...such people just come once in a while...can't stop them...but please...MJ aint that big..doesn mean some one came over to say they heard about the issue and showed concern YOU can use the same excuse to cover up for yourself...It isnt that well spread....to cover up ur ass..It isn't difficult to guess who you are..

All i wan to say is..since WE agreed to let it pass..and it's after like so long...why u wanna bring it up again???grow up please...if u really wan to convey sth..say it out..and please sign off with YOUR own name..please..my blog isnt a popular blog tt ppl just come to read like some popular magazine or whatever shit...So it's not as easy as you think it is to hide ur identity..so please..spare urself and spare me...leave me alone..

And...AC???whatever i did tt makes u think so...sorry...i am not a psychologist but in common it is known tt ppl make such judgemental comments on ppl with 2 reasons..either they feel inferior to that person (which i belive u dun)...or they just hate him....well...if u hate me...suit urself...I've learned how to not let such ppl affect my life....if u are not a christian i wont tell u tt it's a sin as bad as killing some one...but just be it...if u hate me..leave me alone...don't come and mess with me... If reading my blog pisses you off...u have the freedom not to come...i din send a invitation to you...You don't get any rebate for visiting here too...so leave me alone and I will leave you alone... p.s " Leadership ability and maturity does not come naturally with age. If one dun bother to learn and gain experiences...one may just be an old kid." aiya i really can't be bothered about such things lar..please...study for ur promo can???

2006-08-11T06:21:00.000-07:00

ok i am finally blogging here..after very long..lolx i know shiqi..very long..

Today went back AHS...(yeah again) lolx..cos jia yu wants to borrow my sec 3 SS TB..then might as well go earlier and study there..just nice when i reached school Mr Chua and Me Yeow were eating..and Mr Chua was pumping some sec 3 boys for being late for lesson..cos went to play bball..like it was down pouring and i was like held up in the HDB flats b4 i could go up the chang cheng..lolx..

Then Mr Chua asked me to check if they did standard pumping...then one of them was ok..another softball guy couldnt do pumping..OMFG...well softball.........lolx..then he change sit ups lor...did double tt's 40...then after tt talk talk a bit then i asked Mr chua for the store key so i could do work there...yar..then bell rang i went to pass jiayu the book then went to NCC store then did some chem and training start le..oh my oh my..i miss NCC trainings..and i miss wearing NO 4 and finally i wore it...=)..but i admit today i was so happy i played some stupid alien abducting games with part B..but well..after tt we rushed the 10 K walk...and we walked really fast...i was amazed tt i actually had the stamina to run back and forth so many times..when all of them are like dead and i still have the energy to run around encouraging ppl...

I think it's not about the physical strength..it's the morale..being with the cadets just perks me up...and i just did it with them...it was really great achievement and i hope the Part Bs really have some bring-homes from the activity other than just tiredness..and looking stupid shouting cheers on the road...

it's jsut bits and pieces that we gather as walk the ncc life together..

after training we had our usual AAR again...i kinda fianlly see my suggestion of having one small AAR after every training being put into practise...and yar lar..Mr Chua was kinda pissed at some inefficiencies but i think the Part Cs on the whole are doing pretty a good job cos b4 training i was kinda suprised to see some changes in some cadets...

Then Mr Chua asked me to asign the Annual Camp committee..and i tried to do it in the shortest time possible and brieved the OIC what to do and stuff..so hopefully they will report to me good progress...

Then after changing Mr Chua asked me to go dinner..and he treated me...lolx..so we drove to 85 there but din go 85..instead we went to some chicken rice shop to eat...and he said they chef was supposingly from Chatterbox Chincken rice..(the most expensive chicken rice in Singapore..and yet popular...beats me) yar lar..but some how i thought Wen Dong Ji tastes better..lolx so he ordered a 2 person share chicken rice and a fried Tou Fu...it was nice..the Tou Fu and chicken too...yupx and 2 drinks lar..then it was like 15 bucks...oh well....but it's nice food lar..lolx..yupx..

Then we saw Elisa..lolx....b4 we eat she walked pass with her family...then b4 we leave she walked back haha...she oso kinda diaoded i think lolx....Then i kinda asked Mr Chua about her gf...and we chated a lot thing lar..then he told me he was in Dunman Pri which was closed then he wen tto Mountbatten then Tao Nan..i was like EH!! I OSO TRANSFERED TO TAO NAN FROM MPS!!lolx..then he wa slike ok our similarity ends here......i was like..wth....haha...well now we are still similar being in NCC..haha...and talked a lot lar...telling me got htis teacher in AHS Mr Chan Hui Ling..or sth...left le..was exactly same education route as him haha...

Oh yar and he preached to me....hmm..and invited to me go pay a visit to his church....oh well...see how ba...True i think i am drifting from God..like very far..and stuff...sigh....aybe it's God's plan ba...about tonight..

Then i went with him to this Darwin Aquarium to buy one solution..not sure if he bought tt plant..and there got this stupid chanting thing...with damn stupid tone and super serious Singlish and Singnese....haha...and got this shop helper inside...and Indian...and HE SPEAKS HOKKIEN!!!and his english is like totally chinese...haha...but i still think there chanting advertisement is damn irritating...pity the ppl working there...

Ok my leg hurts...tml will be studying day...good luck....bye

2006-07-27T06:36:00.000-07:00

Went to NTU convocation or more well known as graduation today..to see my bro and his gf carol wear square hat...

It was so cool and inspiring...really motivational i guess....yupx..i wanna be there one day too!!!I will...not just bachelor...MASTER!!!!

The Ph.D who gave the opening adress was relaly humorous and inspiring...he said sth i thought was so true..

"I felt so stupid when I was receiving my PhD degree...as i realised I've learnt so little b4...and there're still so much i am yet to learn!"

How true....learning never ends....the simple fact tt university modules are brought down to JC to study..is obviously showing tt we are learning more things and the learning time is getting shorter...so in order to cramp things in..we have to take what's beyond our level of acceptance...

Any way..the ceremony ended suprisingly quick...and i din manage to study much there too..plus my mom dropped my pencil case...many embarrassing moments sia..

Yups and then we saw my bro's ex gf..she was so pretty!!!!really relaly very very pretty yupx...and bro of course..and carol...carol looked so cute and she's very bubbly!!lolx..then we took pics..then i wore the square hat...my bro's and when taking pic with him i wore carol's lolx..so funny..

And my mom was really doing some silly things tt made my cousin and me super embarrassed..b4 we left the refreshment area we caught my bro..then my mom just pooped in like that when he was talking to friend and his prof and his dad and mom were there too...(in case u guys dunno he's my step brother..and of course he was with his mom and step dad)..yar lor..then they were all shocked and the prof looked so stunned..and awkward and they jus tleft lolx...then she like almost snatched the cam from him to take pic..relax lar!!!lolx...yar lor..so took pic..

Then saw jesley too...my bro's step sis..she brought a friend along...some girl staying in their family..like their guardee..(is that what u call it??) from HK..then my mom and dad were saying she's pretty...well no comments..i was too tired then...tried catching some sleep jus tnow in the car too..so now i can mug bio...lolx..

think tml will fail....

see.... study = no fail
no study = fail
so

no study + study = no fail + fail

since

(no + 1) study = (no +1) fail

therefore

STUDY = FAIL #

period...case closed..

then just now when on the way back hear the YI YUE RI JI...kinda feels funny..it's about this girl saying she had a gathering of her sec school friends...then there's this guy Justin whom she had affection towards and they both kinda liked each other and never went beyong the state of friends...and they just spent time together chatting after school studying together..and she said one day she was studying maths for O's and she was so stressed up tt she cried...and he came in and gave her a very very warm hug..and she was very touched and cried in his arms and said thankew..then when she looked into his eyes she couldnt control herself and gave him a KISS on his lips...it's their lil secret...

then when they met up they chatted about everything again..and when it's about relationship..he told her he just broke up with a gf whom he was with for more than a year and she hasn been attached ever since they broke up 3 years ago....they went into a moment of silence...both feeling awkward and she some how felt a lil anticipation....she hopes he could ask her out...he din...she felt a lil disappointed...however they chatted on the phone again..for 2 days..3-4 hours each session...she really hopes if justin still likes her he would make a move...she believes tt it maybe be some sparks there...some chemical reactions may just occur..

I dunno how exactly i am to feel toward this..but as i listened to it...i got some strange feeling not knowing where it's coming from....whatever the case..i need to bath and study now..cya guys...

2006-07-26T05:03:00.000-07:00

Bing bing's theory..

a 5C girlfriend must be..

Cute

Caring

Character

Can Cook....

and...

C cup -_-"

lol totally lame lar..cos today after school went to chinatown yong en care centre with him to settle our CIP...and along the way i see if i can settle a CIP for my class as well..

So we met up with the person in charge there Ms Joy...she's really a nice lady...nice talking to and stuff...i think it's more or less settled to be there lar..

Damn tired..today during GP double period kept dozing off....like totally couldnt make it to wake up...and pay attention..

the best part is this morning then i made it into hall just in time for the Meridian leaders investiture..Ms Lim HS suddenly called me..and she was like..

"Larre...ni de hua yu jiang de bu zuo shi ma?"

then i realised she's a chinese teacher...shocked..in JC u can never tell the subject a teacher teach...cos her english is like damn good too...not like pri and sec school where u can tell by one look what sub the teacher teach..

i was like"erm..hai hao lar"

"Na ni you zuo guo si yi(emcee) ma?"

(a million times already..) i was like oh no please..

"erm you"i dunno where she got the info about me from most prob ms lim lor..then happiness she called me for audition during recess..like out of blue..and after school they told me i was selected..and they wan a draft script like...monday!?

Goodness..and ms lim just given me the time frame for learning agora...i jsut realised i got so much commitments when b4 i entered JC i told myself not to....which i really wonder if every one's JC life is liddat...other than councilors and other leaders..

then on my way travelling around i keep falling into deep sleeps..i dunno why..i think i gonna get some funny disease which i will jsut fall asleep then die strangely...

and yesterday did i mention???i was coming back from AHS then when i board bus 28..this 2 malay girls coming down from the bus were opening sniffing super glue...like OMG!!first time i see such thing with my own eyes..and one of them after sniffing couldnt stand straight and had to lean against a pillar at the bus stop...wth....and the bus was filled with super glue smell lar...got me some serious headache...stupid bitches...they should just stay home and sniff till it corrode their brains totally and die as a retard...

Then on the way back with bing..some how started talking about AHS again..like we feel quite uneven for Mr Moo lar...he spent like 35 years of his life...building the reputation of AHS to how it was...the chinese school...not being racist but being a school with chinese medium is what really made us special in the past 30 odd years....We were so CCA oriented be it UG or Sports...bing was just saying his friends commenting about AHS..words like " oh ahs!!!eh?how come they are not winning Bball champ any more ah??"

"oh ahsncc!!!it's damn good right!" from bing bing's ncc friend in Manjusri...imagine u spent 35 years of ur life seeing the school grow to such a high status and well built reputation..and some one just comes in and in like 1 or 2 years ruin every thing..changing every thing..."moving into a new era"....do u feel easy???

During the refreshment on founders' day we saw Mr Moo..to our astonishment...he was alone...and half way he left...and Doc boon din speak to him at all...he's like the person who made AHS...he's the person who made boon the principal of a TOP SCHOOL in singapore..and who thanked him???she's jsut too engrossed into her own "glory"...talking to teachers tt served the school longer than she did as if they helped her in sth...remembering the first year Mr Wang took over...the founders' day Mr moo was the guest of Honor....this year??sigh...we just love AHS...

2006-07-25T06:58:00.000-07:00

Ok dun ask me what was i talking about in the prev entry...cos i oso dunno..

After school i asked Ming Wei if he's going back to AHS cos edmund yesterday asked me to go back and supervise them in air rifle range..plus they can't open the armoury without an officer there too then i ask why not try asking other CLTs??the answer was they are all very fierce...wad crap..then Ming Wei said he's not going..and asked me to ask zhiyong..then i tried contacting zy,edmund and even aloyciuse...but to no avail..so i cheong down after chem lect to discover doong zhi yong was there already!!!

GOODNESS!!i am so freaking tired these days can??on the bus i wanted to study but fell into deep sleep....hopefully no one i know saw me..haha..though got Mj ppl on the bus but think they were too busy chatting with each other in front..

So i quickly went to canteen and study and got the Chemical Equilibrium right into my head...so proud of myself???nah...I guess as what mr lau said it's an easy chapter..so..nothing to be too cheerful about lar huh??and larre u are still way too far from getting promoted....are u sure u can handle maths yet???chem u've just got ur lousy chemical calculation in ur head(half full)...chem bonding..some of atomic structure and this easy topic..ur gases still have get it right yet!!!and ur maths...sigh...u dun retain who retain??

but these 2 days i am so tired..keep falling asleep..(not really falling asleep) but lazy eyes is driving me nuts in Lectures!!!!!!!!!!!!!i was totally lost in maths lect today....wtf...after i am done studying bio later i better get what maths has gone through in lect today right b4 i go into lt again...

Oh Oh...i suddenly realised an lian is kinda sweet.....esp u both dunno each other's name haha!!!!and tt person may not even know u exist!!!!how cool can that be???not like some ppl tt like to make a big fuss about them having crush on some ppl....totally himbo and bimbotic..

I dunno what kinda help i should seek for..i realise i can understand the concepts...can understand what the theory talk about but i jsut can't apply!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Maybe i seriously should have gone to arts....

I just wanna sleep and never get to wake up one day...tml still gotta go China town with bing bing to settle CIP stuff..Thursday going NTU to see my bro's graduation ceremony.....i think i will either study there or end up snoring...like tt night when discussing PW on the phone..with sean,anna,eugene and jon...the mass conv..they heard me snoring..lolx sorry guys!!!

Today sth pretty embarassing happened..shan't go into details...lolx

2006-07-24T22:33:00.000-07:00

Ok apparently i am in the school library...blogging..and doing nothing...practically nothing..cos hw done...

well i know..i should be studying but these days i am so darn tired for god knows what reason...just reat Mr Lau's blog and was again reminded of the fact that the retaining issue is there..

Obviously we are his weak class..and some how i think the class tt he thinks will most-likely to disband could be us..I DUN WAN THAT...but still...it's so worrying...tha ti will retain duh..

It's been so long since we've sat in the com in library and blog...it's relaly been long..the last time was like when second intake just start...those fun days...now all gone..every day u see every's face are just so so soooooo long and dark and stressed up...

This is what education brings us lar...That day during maths lecture Mr Quek mentioned that the education system forced the students to study so hard..he said" I dun care how bloody smart your are..but ur coutersy is pathetic "

well...it's time we really do some soul searching...yes Gov is trying their best effort in organising some campaigns for character development and improvment of the quality of citizens and us..but on top if that..the way students like us are stressed like some springs stretched to it's maximum...where do we get tt sorta american time to appreciate your effort daddy mommy government??We are not even looking into how we can live in the future and be a polite young adult cos we arn't even sure if we can survive the stupid education system!!like are we even getting promoted!???!!

(ain) larre likes offering mi his lap((:. wad u wan frm mi ar?

No dun think wrong..she's just like beside me...and besides her is shi hui and on the other side of me is shuning..

well ain just sighed.."I want to quit school..do you wan to quit school??let's quit scholl together." see i ain't the only soul..but hey girl!!you like..passed ur mid year!?!?lolx

Yar just liek what i said...every one thinks they will retain...the rate is that when u talk with some one here...one on one...u know it's either him or you...tt goes on to the next level of this game of survivor!now i am sitting beside ain..obviously tt person will be me!!!can you imagine??

I am just worried tt even if most of us gets promoted..our class may be dispersed or watsoever...such nice system we have here!!what's the point of coming to school then???watever!!!pissed off....is getting promoted that much an issue for us poor students???

2006-07-22T08:13:00.000-07:00

Today had been so far the busiest day in my JC life...

Slept at 1 sth last night and woke up at like 5??and mom fetched me to Innova JC for the racial harmony day anchor event...damn tired lar...so in the beginning really had no energy to go and mingle with the kids and when the performance start..the beat boxing was really cool..those beats made by the mouth..really cool...

We took Ai Tong school...yeah FUN JIAN HUI GUAN!!!it's the clan tt founded my pri school (Tao Nan School) too!!!yeah!!SAP school lolx..but poor them too..they know basically nuts about other races...

So after explaining and playing some games with them..they designed a kite and as i sent them to the hall i had to rush off half way to AHS for obvious reason...but Shakthi then smsed me tt they got Second place for kite design!!YEAH!!!!THEY ROCK MAN!!!!!!

Then rushed back to AHS..seen some performance..took lots of pictures with Cheryl together with Chai Jun blah blah blah..yar..then meeting..oh b4 that had refreshment as Aircon hall..wah best refreshment ever taken in AHS...lolx..and seen many many familiar faces...Mr Moo....Mr Wang...Mr LIEW!!!!!!!(My sec 1 form teacher and stayed on to teach us maths half way through sec 2..extending his retirement..and then retired)..Mdm Lau..(DM b4 Mrs Goh)...yar..then went to AHS heritage center...i stayed in the past principals' section for very long..reading every intro of allt he principals....and it's no wonder almost every Aglican respect Mr Moo damn lot..he's really an amazing principal..without him Ahs wouldn have been how it is today...

The past...how AHS was built bit by bit...the OLD SCHOOL SONG!!i saw it and actually sang it once..and really..the sec 1 memories just flashed back.....the old buildings tt no longer exist...really really touching..

Then after meeting changed into school suit..then quickly went 85 bought a belt cos pants too loose..then rushed to tamp long john meet class..for lunch thought i never eat lolx..then went school do ushering duty for band concert..

MJ BAND CONCERT ROCKX!!the Maiden Voyage...combining with the Maiden High school in jap..their performance simply was SUPERB!!!!!Even with 2 years experience in Band when i was a kid..playing Saxophone..i never thought band could be so cool!!!wasted..and there were an encore of the highlight from them...and as they shouted "Aligato Gozaimasda"(or how u spell it) and the MJ band replied them the same..it was really touching lar..but it was damn tiring cos Gladys and me were stationed beside the VIP seats then we had to stand there and not move..my shoe totally has no much support and it hurts..

Then we took pictures after tt...LOTS OF THEM!!and took pics with some relaly relaly cute jap girls..while the girls grabbed the cute guys hahah!!total lameless..tt's my class..the bunch of ppl i cherish..

ok now my brain is half dead...relaly really tired..and just now called my mom and cousin into her room and sorta scolded my cousin in front of my mom's face...it's relaly important to let her know tt she's no longer in China where every one suit her...she want's something..even her own..u ask with a proper attitude!!!

Ok i know there may be places tt really really can't make gramatical sense...not saying that i make a lot of sense in other entries but bear with it today lar..lolx sorry..nights!

2006-07-21T07:33:00.000-07:00

Tml will be the long anticipated ahs 50th anniversary..

I think it is important to really address the issue of the school song...I jsut went through the petition about the reinstatement of the old school song..

As we all know ahs has a long history of Chinese background...ever since Mr Moo left on the year we joined AHS...she saw a huge transformation on her..We are the lucky batch...to have still sang the old school song version for a year...to have still experienced how AHS was like from the past...the sports classes...the celebration over the winning of basketball tournament...Camped in the old buildings where tons of ghost stories were shared from seniors...

Still remember when I was in sec 1..my first ever NCC camp..i was appointed to do sentury duty and was forced by the CLT Gerald then to investigate the strange noise coming out from the said to be hauted girls' toilet from the old block which no longer exist..

Then..the student camp promotion period...when we still had out BK(bible knowledge) lessons...the Church personels invited us and told us come on join the camp..and so that u will be proud tt u once slept in the old block during camps to your juniors!!!As sec 1..we couldnt comprehend..

Now looking back..when the only traces of our fond memories of AHS are just the indoor stadium,D&T block,Clock Tower...when the new buildings rise...new field being constructed...classroom renovations from the "new block" then...and even changed the basketball court and strt soccer court!!!Our only true identity and memory of our 4 years is the old school song..

And in sec 2...as abrubtly as it maybe..it just changed!!!!just how abrubtly???it's a morning announcement!!!and there weren't even music lessons to teach us properly..and htey just expected us to switch over in just 2 weeks time!!!

Initially we refused to...and eventually......as those b4 us left...we have to abid to the new "Trend"....how humiliating for a school with such rich culture and heritage??

NOw as the school shamelessly askes alumni to pay 80 bucks to attend a dinner and take projects to make the celebration more memorable for many...the alumni shockingly discovered that the only thing they recognise about the school has been changed!!!can u imagine alumni returning and pays 80 bucks for the dinner or attend the concert or celebration at schoo...when the familiar tune starts..they can't even open their mouth to join in the singing of the school song!!!WHAT SHAME!?

And today i went back ahs..juniors told me Boon actually said sth about it's time to move on..and settle with it...EXCUSE ME!???MOVE ON!?!!!???FROM WHAT!?FROM WHERE???TO WHERE!??

Dear Dr Boon...did you compose the song???Did you see how AHS walked till today???Did you see how much effort the pass principals..teachers...students...the fund raisings to have gotten those buildings..those names of the buildings...can they be erased???NO!!!!Just liek what the alumni on the petition has said..why u dun see Singapore changing our national athem to make it mor eunderstandable for every one??why not we sing Onward Singapore instead of Majulah Singapura!?Why not we add in some hip hop and maybe some rap into the anthem???NO!!!it's sth we must not change cos it's what the whole nation value!!!!

Similarly...the old school song which has been there for 47 years..is the value shared by thousands of Anglican students from the past!!!I believe many teachers in ahs who graduated from AHS were against the idea of changing the school song back then as what we've heard...so after all...was it an unanimous decision of the decision of the powerful al-mighty one???

I miss the school's old look...the bits and pieces of things and even a sand a stone were worth a memory..i remember how small our NCC store was...the area we fall in..sandy...our mascot tree "ZOLA"...tt was chopped off...the old sci lab..the dust we get in the air when we pump or move...the eco of our shouting as a company in the so called confined area...the tremble of the ground when we bang our boots..then crowd from the harmonica and others watching us as we pump...and of course the famous toilet we change in which is a linking passage from onside of the building to another where ppl walk pass freely as we strip!!For all the alumni...aint tears filling ur eyes as u think back??

So what kinda excuse is it??to make it easier to understand for newbies???and now even starting a malay language class...I am not being racist but we all know the tradition and history of AHS...it's a SAP school..it's what ppl call a CHEENA school..but so?????WE ARE PROUD OF IT!?then what for suit what others think and CHANGE!?Look at the petitions...we ar enot short of non-chinese ex students...that gets good grade for chinese!!like Janice. graduated in 2003...an Indian girl that got level first for express chinese!!Ain't that something to be proud of!?So come on newbies!!if u wanna come to AHS...buck up ur chinese or just FORGET IT!?why would a school choose to lower her standard to suit the students???

It's sth we really really can't comprehend...

2006-07-20T05:42:00.000-07:00

It fianlly happened...

WE ALL knew it so well tt it will happen right??

Ms Lai finally spoke up today during compass lesson...expressing her force on our studies...telling us how close we are to promo...and there u go...all of us are freaked out...putting ourselves in a situation tt the person standing next to u...it's either him or u..will be promoted..

yes mam..we are left with 64 hours for each subject..and 53 for those taking chinese...and as i am sitting here typing..time ticks by...

Actually i am studying for chem test tml....which is a blardy huge topic of chem bonding..i am not prepared to fail it...but neither am i able to say i am gonna pass it...yes it's rithorical...but who isnt feeling that way???ppl getting passes for mid year are shouting they will retain..ppl getting straight Us are screaming they will retain..so who...is able to get promoted??

It's our GP presentation on reality TV...we love watching reality tv...like truman show...but do we realise we are the characters in truman show and the socienty is the Christof...no matter how a teacher..how a principal presses on you...they are in turn oso puppets of this invisible hand called gahmen...where in the name of the wellness of future generations...thou shall learn more and do better in exams to obtain what the sages did..which thinking back...probally only half of what we have..

It's the system..it's in the blood...teach less learn more...get away from books???so we are expected to have done all our tutorials...b4 tutorials even start..and "I DUNNO HOW TO DO" is nothing acceptable..it's a sin and an ugly word to be said in class..

Then...why do we still have tutorials???won't lectures be sufficient??No matter how much we strtch our hand out from this burning inferno of education...we still..have to go through this with the idealogy that as it renews our souls and prepare ourselves..we will one day reach the Garden of Eden...and willingly go back to "enjoy" the tormentation of tutorials and endless tests..putting us through failures...

Just like how i am going to go off and bury myself into chemistry now...it's a show...called "Survivor - Education System"

2006-07-18T08:00:00.000-07:00

Ok i will just make this really short..

today went home with shuning mei xin junkwang and chen en...(was it chen en??think so..sorry haha)yar lar..then on the bus talk talk then got this group of boys from china...probably some really ulu place...

Just wanna say that they really really embarrassed me as a Chinese...as in Chinese CHINESE....like...they are behaving some some bloody hooligans in China...talking about childish shits...fight here fight there....bragging about their experiences in sex...like who give a shit about all that!?

For a moment i really wanted to stand up and slap them one by one and tell them to stop insulting the nation and humiliating themselves and get lost!???!!I dunno how can some one develope to be liddat..when i've never seen any one liddat b4...or maybe cos my parents were really strict on personality developement..esp my dad...

I really feel sorry for their parents...and really really it was emabarrassing...it really explains why the news paper always has negative comments about immigrants from China...It jsut makes us feel more inferior and majority of us are NOT EVEN CLOSE TO WHAT IT SAYS UP THERE!!!I dunno..i've left tt country way too long to relaly know how it's like now..but at least..not for such things to happened???I do admit tt i am not very well connected to China now...but it's like...the least pride of the nation still persists and when u see such acts in public u just feel hurt...i think it's true for any one out there in a foreign land...

2006-07-17T04:28:00.000-07:00

Today went to IJC for the innova anchor event stress test..

Basically due the many absentees we were forced to be reallocated..though not affecting me but Shakthi was reallocated to another group...and Ah jun and me had to take charge of 14 pri 4 school kids...

I thought it would be chaotic but my group of kids were amazingly obedient..or so i thought...they are so cute lar...at first still pretty shy..but they soon made friends with me and one of the girl was like so hyperactive till the end tt she totally treat me like her friend..lolx..

I was so nice to keep faning for them using the placard...lolx..by the end of the day they really enjoyed themselves lar..really fun..i love the kids man!!though it will be the only time i see them..they were like telling me they wanna come my school..to see me..haha..six years down the road..i told them by then i wont be there already..i would probly be in Uni..then they like "THEN WE GO SEE YOU!!" then give tt kiddy smile...oh my...

then got this girl joanne..when queueing up to wait to get boarded onto bus she was so annoyed by the hyper active huiting tt she was like "Larre she very naughty hor...??" lolx damn cute lar..then keep calling me teacher some more...haha

Man..i love kids..then when sending them off...i went off..then from far they shouted "bye bye larre!!!" man so satisfacting...

Sat will be the actual event...lucky today had stress test..if not tt day really will be blur..Jonathan was tehre today...just to pon school..lolx...lamer..then he was playing tt who's more handsome game with the kids..comparing me and him...well we both got our own group of supporters lar huh..haha

lame le lar..sat so many things clash...LIKE WTH!!!I WANNA GO FOR FOUNDER'S DAY!!!sigh..and got PTC...then at night got ushering...then..then...then....esplanade oso cannot go...argh!!!!!!!!

any way today missed alot lessons...MUST BUCK UP!!!!!!!relaly must study hard already...b4 it's too late..

2006-07-16T08:14:00.000-07:00

I dunno why....what's happening to me..these days...some emotion is really haunting me..

Any time any where i just get struck by emotion and suddenly feel damn depressed and damn sad..

could it be something from the past tt come back haunting me or could it be just depression....

or maybe it's just paranoia...

is sth really over or is sth really starting or am i just having illutions all along??

2006-07-15T08:04:00.001-07:00

Just now was browsing on Youtube for ps3 videos..and OMG..i just can't wait for PS3 to come out lar!!!like...OMFG damn cool...it's just a computer on it's own!!!!and in fact even better!!!!like can surf..play dvd..play vcd....has bluetooth...has just pretically every thing!!!!!it has like 4 USB ports???2 are for controllers...other 2 are like..keyboard and mouse or anything!!!shit can't wait for u to come out man..just totally cool lar..and it will have METAL GEAR SOLID 4!!it's the final chapter of the series...how can any guy miss that game man??

Ok tt's about all..i guess..todayreally nothing must to write...cya

ok and yar here is the lil clip my friend recorded for me..a lil bhb..lolx pai seh..

2006-07-15T08:04:00.000-07:00

Just now was browsing on Youtube for ps3 videos..and OMG..i just can't wait for PS3 to come out lar!!!like...OMFG damn cool...it's just a computer on it's own!!!!and in fact even better!!!!like can surf..play dvd..play vcd....has bluetooth...has just pretically every thing!!!!!it has like 4 USB ports???2 are for controllers...other 2 are like..keyboard and mouse or anything!!!shit can't wait for u to come out man..just totally cool lar..and it will have METAL GEAR SOLID 4!!it's the final chapter of the series...how can any guy miss that game man??

Oh yar and this is the lil video my friend recorded for me tt day..lolx..a lil bhb...pai seh...

2006-07-14T10:23:00.000-07:00

Today was really tired..after school the chem make up was cancelled and we had to go council room draw blazers..for ushering..

Took quite long then went back ahs with shuning...today quite a lot went back..then we all talked to the part As...it's...just feels pretty emotional..like..what mal said..experiencing again the feeling of being a specialist..those good old days..

and suddenly i realised AHS really changed a lot...not as what it was already..we lost our Bible Knowledge which was what made us really special..our sports class....and now the whatever center of excellence sport thingy...totally lame lar..and getting really a lot of outsiders entering ahs like their home...quarrels and fights...where did HOLINESS AND RIGHTEOUSNESS GONE TO!?

then went to my mom's concert like myself when shiqi fell sicj and shuning and meixin last minute pangsehded me cos they both din feel well...well lucky them..some of the uncle aunties really CMI...eerrr...nvm the actual concert will be next month in VCH..then will all be professionals..so hopefully can get friends along ba..

Then at night went to esplanade for dinner...with bro and carol..ate a lot food sia...shiok esp after like 14 hours of starving..lolx..

Then when driving back passing by bedok swimming complex..i saorta glanced in and saw the place where there is a lil counter where ppl can buy some fries and nugget....and suddenly all memories flooded me..

Remember when we were just kids...in sec 1..our first event was swimming lesson every tuesday for us..thought i joined the other shift some times...on monday..and after every swimming session we would sit there and chit chat and have some fries.....b4 walking back to take bus...those really fresh memories seemed like it was just yesterday..

And today after school...Jon,Desheng,and me went to so high and crazy about our unifrom group lives in sec school and did drills and commands and sang a lot of songs...the class joined us in the talk..then shihui ain who were from NPCC and Guides were brought high too..then we said how we were tekaned..and how we tekaned ppl...those memories....like sec one being pumped in the toilet while bathing by Gerald Sir then...lolx..

All those fresh memories...ncc days..secondary school fun and laughters..went esplanade and sorta was reminded when we went for concert for music lession in sec 2...and all jsut flash back..

looking back now..seeing so many pri school friends...sec school friends...how we all grew and changed..and for sec 1 toots and boom suddenly we are all in JC1!!!!!!and soon we will be takin gour A levels!(if i get promoted tt is to say) and there u go...our school uniform days are officially over!!!and guys will be going to army!!and the girl sitting next to u today will be ur seniors in UNI!!!like WOW!!!how life brings changes to u...

Emotion filled lar...and during ncc..we all attempted to do a Joga Bonito clip..lolx but to avail...guess now we each have specialist skills ba..lik emal has successfully masters the pull chip trick of ronaldinho and i can just do some lousy step-overs..but still we tried filming...thief filmed for me the step overs..lolx send me please!!lolx...it's fun lar...being together..just reminds us of the NCC life...

2006-07-12T08:07:00.000-07:00

Went air rifle today..like the sec or 3 time of the year???Honestly..till now i still wonder why and how i landed up in Air Rifle..so totally not like what i thought my JC cca would be like...like...Jaryl just refused to make new friends in MJ during Orientation and pulled me to the trial..and i put it like last choice or sth and i just got in!!???i mean..not tt i really dislike it but...sigh......well once a week cca training...indeed is what i wanted so..jsut be it ba..any way the ppl in it are nice...maybe not so some..oh just one but i dun care???like we dun even know each other??he chose to suddenly give me ap face for God knows why..then be it?

I am so freaking pissed off by EOM..like how the hell am I suppose to evaluate a 197 page report from ministry of health on the incidence of cancer in Singapore!?!?it is helpful to the project but it's simply too huge...i am so driven mad by it i need to ask Mr Cheong about it...argh..

I just freaking broke a bowl...like AT THIS FREAKING HOUR???like wtf....what a day....I seriously wondering what am I doing now...where has all my motivation and inspiration gone to???all my fighting spirit and just the drive to do sth to prove myself??where did i all go after holiday???after my pathetic EUUUU result???wherever it has gone to...I know i have 2.5 month left to promo...and I have to find it like NOW!!!N-O-W!!!

I dun hope to be a scholar...a straight Ace taker...i am jsut an ordinary Meridian...I just hope to be promoted....

2006-07-11T01:16:00.000-07:00

Oh my!!MY FIRST E!!!!MY FIRST PASS!!!and of course should be the only one since Mr Hon frankly told us that whole class got killed by Econs and the highest grade in the level is E!!!!omfg!!

Stress is now really coming...when the promo is just 2.5 months from now and the school doesn give us a break by piling up projects on us..

Here i have in charge of Learning Agora..youth day appeal project oso on going..NYAA gold residential project...PW...GP presentation..never ending!!!

brrrrrrrrrr.....

Forgot to mention..sunday bro came with carol..his gf..to have dinner...then after tt we watched a lot of funny clips and listened to this Mr Brown show..then Carol was asking about why is this Gayle Nerva pic on my friendster....

I told her i thought she's pretty hot...then she was like..."oh really??eh she's my friend's friend leh!!!wanna know her??hee hee" i was like....speechless!!!!like...DUH!!!!but come on lar..can i say like..YES YES YES!!!!no lar...just remain cool haha..."oh heard she RJ right??" then carol told me she was in RJ and now quit to go poly...*smart girl*....oh well...i am not so himbo.....i shall maintain the diff btw me and some particularly low class despo ppl haha...watever...just random!!

2006-07-09T04:00:00.000-07:00

Last night went mal's house for WC battle of the 3rd and 4th position again...

Germany against portugal..I am pretty neutral on it...in fact after first half i was more on hoping portugal would win cos tt would give me more winning..

But i really can't help but to comment that Portugal is really disappointing me esp C.Ronaldo(hey mal lac lolx)...he endorse Nike..holds the name of Joga Bonito...Beautiful game and yet he's the most obvious DIVER in the tournament..

Just the match yesterday alone..he dived like 5 or 6 times..some a so obvious..tt if i am the ref i would have given him a yellow card to warn him!!It's really overboard..

Tonight shall be the finals...gotta really buy some bet...last chance lolx...just buy with my winnings in the past 2 maths...around 40 dollars..so...yar..

Joga bonito baby...tonight it's when legends are born!!!

2006-07-07T06:53:00.000-07:00

Every time i get back my results..it's jsut the same....U...oh wtf!!!Deserve it lar..like look at me...LTC,then went to HQ take Spect course..how can i not flunk??

Dun tell me every one flops their mid year..there's an end to failures and i wanna meet it...LIEK NOW!!!??

I am really starting to appreciate Mr Yeow more and more..he's such a great teacher...always trying to make class so interesting for us...so lively...every sweat he shed in class is really appreciated..and today being hte last tutorial of the day after bio lec which we got back our bio results...he said..."Dun worry,i know it's very demoralising,it's meant to slaughter you,now let's let it go and move it,leave it behind..." and he really din mention it any more!!!

but there he goes..telling us he's gonna be replaced by mr Owen Tan...WHY!?he gave up on us??i dunno..i am not saying Mr Tan isnt a good teacher..he's not even taught us yet..but..who can be as good as Mr Yeow???when i first seen him...i was so glad and happy and thought my Bio will relaly make it...and now..

And even Mr Lau is leaving..replacing by Mrs Choo...she's veyr nice and patient..but her talking some times really like Lullaby!!!She's responsible..but Mr Lau is always keeping the class lively too...allowing me to style his hair..and he happily walking around showing to ppl and asking ppl" How does my hair look?" Where to find such bubbly tutor??

LMLN..."Lick My Little Nipples" the Mr Lau's folder name on IVLE..it's how Jon and De Sheng translates it..his 2 lil chair and vice chair of IGC..and he's to leave us!?why??why are they chaning out tutors liddat!?is 06s306 really gonan disband next year!?NO!!!!

2006-07-04T07:28:00.000-07:00

"Some times we are like sheeps..following the shepard so blindly..cos we totally trust in him.Some times when the sheperd is wrong we oso dunno..the sheeps follow just one blind faith,Just on the fact tt the sheperd may have given them good things.Until they fell off the cliff then they realise it's wrong"

It's said by Ms Eng Lim,the lady in charge of greencircle farm..which we visited today for our PW.A trip with anna,jen ming zhi and eugene..

It was a cool place...just veyr noisy..she's a very friendly and nice lady..giving up her job as an educator to become what i call a TRUE EDUCATOR!educating the right values,bringing herself away from the chaos of the city life and the never ending politics to be close to nature and as she said..feel close to the earth..what a great lady...only one irritatinb part..her facial expressions some time remind me of some other "EDUCATOR" or so he calls himself..

I dunno why,tt phrase she said when we interviewing her just caught me...i dunno why after so long i still want to bring tt phrase up...it's so true tt some times we just follow some one's words like we've been charmed until really sth happen then we do realise...

My cousin been here less than a month..her EQ..just like what her dad said.super high..she's like picking up attentions from the street..and there are ppl asking her for number...(girls)..who knows...may be a guy..and she's been smsing her..just now my mom found out..and she called over to talk to her nicely..reminds me of what happened to me..but at least..my mom really talk nicely...and not just SHOUT and SCREAM like some really lowly educated ppl..(no offence)..now my mom and dad educating her...whatever..i dun care..girls...

Tml school officially start...promo pressure officially comes...fingers crossed..hope i survive...i mean..look at our mid year results...every one getting F4...as in F times 4....straight F!!!shiqi is right..."no one leaves mj after 2 years..it's at least a 3 year journey.."where other JC ppl worry only about their A levels,here in MJ ppl worry more about promos...once u survive it.it means ur A level is ok...come on...tt's how MJ shoot up to 6th right??stress...how to survive??maybe ppl will live to tell the story...din i hear enough of it...???

I dun blame any one for my poor performance in acedemic..i dunno why i was crowned the only factor affecting some one's...when tt person does it ...self??by always getting ...self involved in issues related to the opposite sex..and to cover up for that...just KEEPS PUTTING THE BLAME ONTO ME!!??come on..give it a break..why not tell the truth??

"mom actually i am the flirt..i can't control my feelings toward goodlooking guys..cos i think looking good character must be good..i can't help having crushes..i thought u would understand at least he doesn know(or so i hope) and we aint in a BGR.." dun hold back ur laughters...

2006-07-03T06:24:00.000-07:00

Wootx..I am back..lolx after shopping at queensway...

Got the 2 pairs of shoes tt i eyed for...and quite a good bargain i guess...178 in totally for both shoes...got a bargain of 50 bucks..well..guess i still need to improve on it..lolx

here are the babes..

This one is total 90 Shift..the boots Wayne Rooney wore in Germany..

And this is Nike dunk..newest colour worx..lolx..well buy..well saved money..yupx..!!=)but acutally was looking for MV and the joga bonito series..but they got sold out!!!!!wtf...but never the less..totaly 90 shift looked cool still right??

Yeah tt's about all...my cousin is seriously ap....totally ap..spoilt brat...whatever..her route..if she doesn get into a school..then she can't blame us any more for "caring for her the way we think is good for her"..

2006-07-02T00:45:00.000-07:00

Last night spent watching soccer at malcolm's place..andrew,boss,king,soh and zhao were there too...lucky me..i went return DVD,change winning eleven 10 CD(which turned out to be faulty as well) and on the bus to mal's place i snaped my spects..which is nice..cos just right b4 tt i was thinking of a way to tell my mom i need a pair of new spects...lolx..

Any way reached mal's house and her mom was nice to help me fix the spects...as in...tape it....lolx then played winning eleven 9...

the matches last night were totally upsetting..after the engliand supporting side(all of us) and portugal supporting side(MAL...one and only lolx)..it turned out to be penalty and RICARDO WAS BLOODY ON FORM!!!!there u go...England goes home...well they deserved it cos they played like shit!!!!i can tell u the match was not even as exciting as out A devision matches...

So we wait...let's see France and Brazil...come on...clash of hte 2 greatest football players on this planet...Ronaldinho and Henry......and WTF...Brazil got sent home too!!!well maybe by some luck or the referee was just bastard...the free kick awarded were so one sidely to France and so was the one tt lead to a goal...Brazil..learn ur lesson...complacency KILLS!!!!i believe this is the shortest world cup journey ur ever had in history.....adding on to the fact tt your called yourselves the best team in history by far...IRONIC!!

Now the night really got wild...after match..went mal room saw some funny video...and tt horny guy showed us all his stock of "Good stuffs"..lolx all the FHM and MAXIMs...HE EVEN GOT MEN'S HEALTH!!lolx gay...yar lor...then King was so excited..zhao too...at all the big..ermm....haha..

Then read some funny articles..."Who will most likely to have sex with you but not." Got mention your hot first cousin wor..lolx..wtf!!!????Singapore has became wat...

and mal's introduction of a nice game....one word..HORNY...lolx...

Sigh..2 upsets in one single night...wtf wtf......finals will be....Germany against France....eventually German get the title...look at this year's world cup....the referees....all fucked up biase..why does FIFA reject the SG ref from top 16 onward!?stupid ang mo...play it beautifully lar!!???

Coughs....sigh....bye

2006-07-01T02:30:00.000-07:00

Yo...lolx...back...

yesterday went to ahs sports day...goodness...why they like to sit beside GB so much!!!!!!??????why not guides!!!????

Whatever...we won second...in cheering competition when clearly we were the best!!!whatever..it's subjective..so it's alright lar hor??

We saw some couples...scandalous couples..lolx...and some new couples...then Jonathan was like telling me..." Larre u realise sth??all NCC guys got cheated by girls...U and ...... kena by GB... then ... kena guides...then blah blah blah..." oh yar...haha it was when we saw some one and we were all like feeling unfair for our friend so jon and soh they all started KBing her...lolx....

True..all our so called "girlfriends" left us when we needed them the most...like when i got such serious ulcers tt i had to take super heavy anti-biotics...injections and i couldnt eat and anything..down with fever...when my friend was hospitalized...they actually thought my broke up was very cool!!!as in very low profile..they dunno it man..i got into so deep shit....tt unintentionally was put onto me..

True..we were all too nice...the girls just come to u and tell u to get lost...and give us all sorta stupid reasons when after all we discover oh!!!they fell for another guy!!!!wtf???u can tell us straight ok???we dont flirt doesn mean we aint cool....so they flirt they are nice lar?????"Nan ren bu huai nu ren bu ai" issit???fuck it lar..

But well..jon was like saying it's sad..i was like eh u got no right to say tt ok u hurt girls...he was like "i help your revenge wad"....your head ah lolx..but well some times the girls deserve it...some times u gotta know..not only your hearts are made of flesh and blood ok???

Played soccer for 2 consequtive days...just now played with MJ ppl..kuo guang and his other 2 friends and andrew kah wee,wysen randy...fun..and i found myself back...it's been so long since b4 o'level tt i never really played soccer..that i forgotten how to play..for the past few days i was asking myself..where was the me i know???tt me whenever i see football i feel the adrenaline pumping all over me...feel the thrill...that when i touch the ball all the movements just come on it's own...it was gone..today i see it back....Joga Bonito...

Promo in 2 months time...tonight going to malcolm's house for england and portugal match...SONG BO!!!!brillian match to catch....i am wearing my england wristeband tonight..just to be rival with mal haha...kidding..

headaching...i need rest...monday gonna get my shoe...i dun care...i wan nike flat bottom and a street soccer boots..Mecurium Vapour!!!

2006-06-29T03:30:00.000-07:00

Argh..i am finally back...i know ppl missed me lolx..

Fianlly..my monitor is ok..like..jsut buy then come back cannot work..give me a stupid power saving mode..like thankew for concerning about my electric bills lar but hey..DID I GIVE YOU TT INSTRUCTION???!!!lolx..

LG oso damn cheapo lar..the hotline i think is some random telephone in tt shop..then no body pick up..and the so called conputer voice message is just a human voice recording..and worse...i called another department hoping to speak to a real human...he said he will get me to the right department..I was like waiting for some music...HE JUST COVERED THE MOUTH WITH HIS HAND AND GOT ME A LADY....forget it...lazy to type out full story..

I like my hair colour...though i think it's getting more and more obvious...I DID NOT BLEACH IT!! lolx..

I so gonna die...my mid year...ppl say every body fails it.. i think i am the every body..

I study Bio..like mad..in the end what i studied came out as ONE pathetic MCQ question...wtf...

Who cares..tonight i gonna watch a good WC match..with a good monitor..and tml go see sportsday..and soccer...yeah man..

I came out with some very chim philosophy today!!!

I would never go back to before..like the wooden chopstick..you break them apart to use it...though they were so perfectly joint together but after breaking them..any one thought of putting them back??no matter what kinda super glue u use..it will still be some cracks and the tissues just wont match...have u seen any one washing them and reuse them???

Random..idea is...what is over is over..it may still ahve some parts worth treasuring and thinking back..but it ain enough to overcome what broke it..

went cs have lunch...and the technician came at like 4.15 so i couldnt make it to the class dinner...so...shiqi,shuning,meixin,huiyuan,clarin and andrew came my place to watch SAW 2....freak..damn disgusting show..and...what kinda ending..Saw3 is soo coming out...cheapo..watever...haha.

any way just so happy tt midyear is over and so happy to see every one back in school agian..i think i am gonna retain..well i wont allow tt to happen so i will go poly..or maybe go army first..lolx..LARRE!!WAKE UP!!!

2006-06-23T04:47:00.000-07:00

Went ahs today with shiqi siauling and junkwang as planned..lolx..din realyl do much again..too much talking..so when tml we go back there really must study le..promise..promise....

Went to 85 to eat...my long lost best friend..lolx the Cai Tou Kuey there...shiok..siauling enjoyed her fav bak chop mee..lolx..and kwang had his fishball noodles shi qi just had cheng tng...my recommendation..lolx..oops..

My cousin called me..asking me when i go home..shit..i had to go back and cook for her cos my mom not at home..and my dad..well all i can say is he's a workaholic..so..cooking???nah..

Got home 7 sth..my cousin fell asleep in her room haha...diao ask her if she hungry she said no..surely de...but she ate damn lots during lunch...a bit...dunno whether is she buy one or her dunno whatever friend ask her to buy then share together eat..she doesn know how to control her money yet..cos back in China she's a rich and "generous" kid..so yar..

so quickly ask her to go bath then i go cook for her lor..damn i feel like a mother now...shit man...haha..watever...In the future will cook for my wife and children wad..who cares..My own cousin leh!!!of course must take care of her right...hmm..

Stop consoling yourself larre!!!brrr...

2006-06-22T09:36:00.000-07:00

Hey..today went back ahs to study..realised so long never touch books..all gone..dieded...sigh..chem and maths really cannot make it..

Tml going again..with siauling and shiqi to pia bio and hopefully can get them to straighten my head on maths and chem..

My cousin went to the dunno whatever school today..totally hopeless..she came back then just nice i was with junkwang kahwee andrew and wei jian at tamp mac and my mom never cook so i asked her come over so i bought her mac to eat..whiile we tried to study but obviously not cos wei jian's head is packed with soccer betting...lolx..

I dunno if i can be a good cousin..try my best to be ba..yupx..after all we were very very close but for so many years she never really stay with me..though we appear to be as close as b4 but obviously i have a distance to compare with my another cousin with her..

Anyway..i just paid a visit to this so called hidden blog...lolx it's been long..really long..the pictures gone..even the music's gone...but the tag is still there...everything..lolx...some times i think i maybe be holding too much responsibility for her tt i can't just let her go..not tt emotionally i am attached to her..just worry about her safety and well-being...if some guy with wicked mind is trying to approach her or sth...i dunno how to phrase it..it's just a man's instinct??

Wadever the case...i am so numb..not with love or emotion..but trust..i can't find the thing and the courage for me to really put trust in another girl...any more lik ehow i did b4...i always trusted ppl..so easily...so head over knees...because you said all girls will do that...I asked another girl she said she wanna slap you for saying that...so who do i trust???lolx tt really made me sound like i am turning into a gay....watever...life is short...i have much more better things to do...

2006-06-19T07:28:00.000-07:00

Yo back..fianlly after all the ncc and stuff...got time to blog...this morning woke up at 5 to go airport fetch my cousin..my mom surely not blur one..blur can le still so stubborn..no choice i alighted early to rush down to pick my cousin...she nice nice drop me off in the middile of the road...like so random lar..

wadever..i heard th eplane arrived early..i went there my cousin was already sitting there alone..like a lil depressed girl..lolx..so i went up to get her..she was still a lil restricted then..then i calle dmy mom she haven park yet so she said she would drive up..luckily SIA attendant very nice..called my mom and took care of all her entry prosidure...so every thing went on smoothly lar..then got her hom..and yar lar last night had a family operation to leave out the room for her and i got a new TV!!

FINALLY!!!man..21 inch leh!!so huge lar...i mean for my room lar...some mroe with remote and every thing...gosh..shiok...yar..then my cousin went around with my mom to try to get some school..but to no avail...lolx..

Any ways..just now i taught her english...asking her to memorise some words..and tml i shall giv eher spelling..damn it..what about my JCT???

Nvm not the point..just now i taught her finish..she took out her tarrot cards..then she sorta tell my fortune for me..about love...it wa slike..wtf!!!soooo freaky can???damn damn accurate!!!!super accurate!!!!!!!!not tt i am being supersticious or wad..but it's really super freaky lar!!!!!!!we tried twice using 2 diff methods..both are so freakily accurate...we went on to tell my studies..wah biang!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!bloody freaky...and hers as well....OMG!!!!!!!at least now i know what i should do le....lolx..

today the first training the part C's took..it's so satisfying..the new patch...seen them grew..from kids to now boys liek what malcolm said about his former babies...lolx...not yet men..but soon to be!!!i am sure they will do him proud..and help AHSNCC strive for higher ground...!!all the best!=)

But any way..today training during the cheer training quite boring for me lar cos..nothing much i can do..lolx..plus doong was there..enough to over look..so i wandered off and joined Sam they all cos they were studying in AH...WAHH!!!damn..dun remind me..sia lar there like concert lar..rachelle,Modissa,Sam...all singing plus then i go...all sing and sing...then rachelle suddenly tell me next year if i go join Music Extrodinaire solo i should sing Shou Fang Kai..then i hear her MP3..yar she hearing tt so i hear and sing along she was like.."wah practising for next year already ah??so fast??" lolx randomness..lolx told u..but we sang to our heart's content and made a lot jokes tt cracked every one up..really lighthearted time..lolx...adding on to the fact tt i only had 4 hours of sleep last night for a whole day's activity like this...hmm..thank goodness..

Jim just smsed me...tml got trainifire...YAR RIGHT I WILL GO!!!get a life man..

2006-06-17T10:20:00.000-07:00

1.Do the following WITHOUT complains
2.Choose 5 person to do this after you completed yours
3.Leave a tag on the person's tagboard to say he/she have been tagged
4.Start your post with "I have been tagged!" then do this

I HAVE BEEN TAGGED BY Siauling

FavouritesFavourite Colour: black/blue
Favourite Food: Japanese/Chinese/western
Favourite Song: Jay Chou/anything tt i can catch
Favourite Movie: sweet,touching and comedy
Favourite Sport: soccer,automobile
Favourite Day of the Week: none
Favourite Season: winter
Favourite Ice Cream: vanilla

Currents

Current Mood: not very happy (for a long time already)
Current taste: Tasteless
Current Clothes: shirt and shorts
Current Desktop: classmates
Current Toenail Colour: the colour God gave me
Curent Time: 1.10AM
Current Surroundings: My room
Current Annoyances: this thing lolx
Current Thoughts: a lot..deep

First

First Best Friends: forgot name le..lolx
First Crush: hmmm dun say
First Movie: Lion King?First Lie: I din't do it!!lolx
First Music: SedimentalLastsLast Cigarette: none
Last Drink: fruite punchLast Car Ride: bus 17
Last Crush: dead
Last Movie: The OmenLast Phone Call: forgot
Last CD played: forgot

Have you ever

Have you ever dated one of your best friend: Duh..i dun date strangers??
Have you ever broken the law: Yup
Have you ever been arrested: No!
Have you ever skinny-dipped: what does tt mean??
Have you ever been on TV: yep
Have you ever kissed someone you dont know: nope..

5 things you are wearing: spects,pants,shirt,underwear,wrist band
4 things you done today: sleep,study.take bus,go for NCC,
3 things you can hear right now: the noisy computer fan,aircon,typing(well my room is very quiet now)
1 thing you do when you are bored: Stone

HMM 5 people!
1.Shiqi
2.Siauling
3.Cindy
4.Tabitha(cos recently just started chatting with her =) )
5.Kah Wee

just...dun read too much into it...;)

2006-06-17T09:49:00.000-07:00

Today was the POP of the sec fours...Morning it was a real cock up..i thought the stress test was today..and i rushed down to IJC..INNOVE JC LEH!!wtf...go there..shit..why does it look so empty???damn it...it's 17th JULY!!!thanks...thanks..

Nvm rushed back..changed into NO3 and rushed to school...see them take over...kinda was reminded of a year ago..when we stepped down..how they tok over..how they grew..and even back to when we took over....

...how time flies...so much happened...

Seen how they grew..how they matured..how they showed us tt we picked the right ppl for the jobs..how they workd together to make AHSNCC proud...to all the part Cs...remember what i said begin with the end in mind...dun keep dwelling on today how ur take over..but start thinking about the day you guys pass out...how u want it to be..what u want the ppl taking over to be...

And to your question..what is my Motivation of being a CLT..i will tell you it's this...I love the sense of satisfaction when i see new batch of ppl taking over..when i see the Part B which i took when they were Part A taking over one day..which i will...that is my drive....how i can help moulding a piece of their life to hopefully make them better ppl..is my ultimate drive....simple as that..

I wont say i am a successful leader..but i hope to be a successful learner..one not only learn from the old but oso from the young...Today Alan's speech was really worth poundering..."You've came into NCC..make sure you don't leave with a regret.." sth liddat..i think it's very true...whatever one do..dun do and regret afterward...I do wrong things some times...but i never regret over what i've done......It may seem wrong..but some times..it's only right to do wrong..cos under circumstances..you are in no position to tell right or wrong...

Till today i am still feeling very lucky to have joined NCC...yupx...every time i put on the uniform..i attend sth...i learn sth new...and i can apply...I think it is also why it's one of the most supreme UG in singapore..

2006-06-16T05:43:00.000-07:00

Yo...finally..today played soccer..finally!!

It's fun lar..but..quite rough haha..a lot of cliding and tackling...first i was kicked on the face..by jun yu...all the grass went into my mouth...then i was slided by jun yu again..this time i flew up cos he slided by pivot leg..and hit the ground hard rolling 2 rounds lolx..but it was an exelleng tackle cos he got the ball first...JUST IN TIME!!!i see some profession in tt one!!both tie tackle and the fall hee..

Then i was tackled again..u guess it...jun yu again..lolx...but this time we both fell and i sorta pressed his arm..lolx sorry bro..but it was fun lar..yupx..

Jonathon was playing striker..and one chance..when he was facing keeper..big kelvin alone...he was brought down by him when he was saving the ball and he fell hard...him,kel,and leo...and jon sorta fell on the rough surface..and hit his face...which had some cuts..and he was pretty uncoonscious and when he grab a hold of himself..he sorta forget how he got there..and stuff..so we like asked him questions to regain his conscious...

but once he's conscious..he kept asking for mirror..haha..HA HAS ONE IN HIS BAG!!!!goodness...yar he so worried tt he will disfigure can..tt he no mood in anything..and after match we brought him to clinic..doc ask him to buy a cream if he doesn wan scar...costing 75 bucks..siao...con money....

Ai mei bo bian but he has to return to the clinic tml..lolx...he was praying like mad..tt he wont be disfigured and we joked tt he will lose his rice bowl lolx..kidding..

song bo got home...too tired to sleep..cos the fatigue is too overwhelming...sigh..tired...but what a day..lolx...score was 3-3.....AHSNCC was 3-1 in lead while Falcon Scouts made a great come back in the last 10 minutes or so...GG...=)...

Ok tml going to IJC for stress test...for the racial harmony day anchor event...then hope can make it back for the POP in ahs..yupx..I AM GOING BACK TO AHS FOR NCC!!!!NCC!!!!!!

Shi qi said she felt she hasn seen me for a long time...YAR!!!!i was so hit by it...I MISS EVERY ONE IN SCHOOL LAR!!!not tt i really miss going to school...but...it's so contradicting...irony...i wan to go back school so badly cos i miss the people..but i know so clearly tt once i return it means MID year and i am so not prepared for it...Why!!???what a dilemma!!!brrrr........

I was helping my mom in the kitchen..preparing and cutting...the maid she got back was like..a bit slow...doing hwat she shouldnt do..lolx..my cousin is coming over to sg to study on monday...like so weird..suddenly having a younger sister...she asked me to teach her..hope i have the time...hope she can get into a good sec school...yupx..but she's very dong shi....she sorta knows what's happening in her family and what's right and what's wrong and is totally ok with living with us...so..see how it goes...maybe i can learn how to treat girls better ba haha!!!

OK my mom is high now...cos she thinks she prepared very nice food today..steamed fish and A LOT MORE!!!she's so happy and asking me to go out and see cos she thinks it's damn nice herself..cos she took the fresh vegetables from cameron highland..lolx..ok she asking me to buy beer..song bo!!!lolx..i was like why u cook so much...."you just come back from camp mar...so cook some thing nice for you lor..".....erm..how am i to react....tt day i ran out form house..came back my dad told me he scolded my mom...he told her never to say things tt hurt ppl esp her own son ever again.....very sternly...he told me he really cares for me now cos he sees tt i have improved a lot and stuff....

hmm...maybe things are getting better for me????watever the case...once i can..i will move out...yupx...ciao!!!

2006-06-14T07:45:00.000-07:00

I shouldnt be here..i should be in HQ..i was already setting in there..and Devine wont give up trying to go home..and book out and at 8 sth fianlly he succeeded and dragged me out too..lucky his mom fetched me home..but tml morning hjave to report back b4 7..HOW SIA!!hope mom can fetch me..fingers crossed..

Din manage to study..and missed my soccer...every thing..but it's kinda fun taking camp as a CLT in hq..lolx...see the cadets...how u impact them...how u change them..and everything...just worth while..but when reality hits...MID YEAR!!!

All the JC students jsut admit..we are all gonna flop....wtf..

2006-06-13T04:45:00.000-07:00

yo..thought i should blog b4 booking in..yesterday had a soccer training tt wasnt really a training cos our lovely falcon scouts were using the field..and we had to play soccer in the court..and many of us with no shoe including me..played with no shoe...lolx..and sure now i am walking weirdly..blisters every where..lolx..

It was really fun lar..cos it's been so long and still such group of us from part D 05 can still gather...and have soccer and paly match with scout alumni..it's really sth to compliment...yupx..

Oh and the night b4..i was sorta running away from home cos really cannot stand..came out and smsed ppl to come out pei me..and jeslyn was like out immediately..lolx shocked sia..but thanks any way girl..lolx..yupx..dun be so caring leh..care for others oso must put urself in mind first right..lolx my slippers lousy u lend me urs u bare foot ah??dumb..lolx...thanks lar..sweet sia..

Ne way..yar went back to sleep and morning left house for soccer...then went to eat with Mal,King,Boss,Joneh,Tong Wei,Sin kiat...then after tt went arcade..INITIAL D TIME!!!lolx..yeah..all the memories man..Mal sure couldnt stand the temptation and started again..bought a new FD..lolx..

Tong wei now police liao..lolx must be careful around lolx..later Jin Cha Bei Bei catch you go lock you up then GG...lolx..he play arcade tt marvel VS capcom..IN PAR MAN!!!GOD LIKE!!!he play arcade damn hua sia..one token play till finish off the boss....sia la...idol..

Then TW treated us pool..lolx..fun lar..and thanks to samuel who came all the way from orchard to pass me the stall key so i can get my boots this morning..lolx..sorry i couldnt make it back on time to thank you persoanlly..pai seh..

Today after getting boots cut my hair...sian..when will i finally get my hair DYED!!!it's like..forever lar!!!damn it..ok ok gotta prepare to book in liao..CYA!!

OH YAR AND I FORGOT TO MENTION!!!I AM MISSING THE BRAZIL MATCH TONIGHT WHICH THEY ARE GOING TO MAL'S HOUSE TO WATCH AND TML GONNA PLAY SOCCER....NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2006-06-11T06:38:00.000-07:00

darn it..today suck..totally suck..was so looking forward to the soccer training tt was by right to be today..but nice weather...postponed to tml..it better be fine tml!!!BETTER BE!!!

Sianed at home..then dinner time the maid my mom brought home from her friend's house was surely unable to cook...from what i heard from her she doesn even cook much..or maybe she wasn't allowed to cook some very nice food there..and her employer doesn know how to cook neither..so i sorta cooked the dinner...

My mom was back..like wtf...she called me asking me to get the maid down to bring her stuff up...i did it and hurried her to go down...and then she called again to ask if my dad is in so tt i can ask him down too...so i did...came up..YOU KNO WHAT!!!???she f'cking blame me for not calling my dad down after the first call she made..and she claims tt she requested it in the first call!!WTF!!!!???since when!!!???i hate it when she make up stories to push responsibility EVERY SINGLE TIME some thing like this happen!!!and worse still..i kept quiet...she thinks i was found guilty and go on be nice to every one and ignore me!!!then my dad called the God knows which asshole to say thankew..and came out telling my mom next time give instructions clearly...she shouted...I REMEMBER CLEARLY I CALLED FIRST TIME AND ASKED YOU BOTH TO COME DOWN..and she came up with some illusion speeches she made on the call...SHE DOES TT EVERY SINGLE TIME!!!always say sth she enver said b4!!!to make the blame MINE!!!!can u imagine it!!!???getting framed by your own mom..

I couldnt hold it and said hey the first time u jsut asked for the maid ok!!!???she was like..you can call my friend and ask!!!i was liek ASK LAR!!!(it's tt friend again..tt she conned me to eat dinner at pasir ris beach last time.if u read tt entry..now u know why i hate being with her friends.)and the thing i am pissed at her the most for entire life is...WHEN SHE THINKS SHE'S RIGHT and when i talk to her..when any one talk to her..she treat you like transparent!!!!you can talk to her..she can walk right pass you and not even pretending you are there!!!giving tt bloody idiotic cold face and walk straight...looking straight ahead...tt kinda face which u just can't hold back to give a punch on!!!like WTF!?PHONE RANG I HURRIED TO GET IT...PICKED UP..YOU ASKED ME TO GET MAID DOWN I DID..AND HURRIED HER..CALLED AGAIN AND ASK ME TO GET FATHER DOWN I DID..BTW HE DRAGGED THE TIME SLOWLY AND BROUGHT SOME PLATE OUT OF HIS ROOM....AND IN THE END WHAT I GET!!!???BEING FRAMED BY WHAT YOU DIN DO RIGHT!!!WTF WTF WTF!!!????SPOIL MY ALREADY KNS DAY!!!

2006-06-10T04:25:00.000-07:00

Yo...

Second post of da day eh??i just ain know what is tired...

Went hq for meeting...hmm..yeah..all those familiar faces of 50th and previous intake CLTs...haha it's so typical..jun wei and me went there waiting time started studying...sigh..MJ...lolx..Wadi happily chatting lolx..then i go MPH help Sgt Mustaquim take a key..cycle up..central having hteir spec course photo taking..ran into even more friends..lolx yo to all..yupx..then cycle half way suddenly heard ppl greating me...it's my dearest AHSNCC SYF opening ceremony GOH!!!lolx..look at my part Bs..all look so yan dao sia..haha...

Yar lor tt's it..such a short meeting..went through everthing..i will be taking Part C's spec course..but the last 2 days nia cos iw ont be going to Tekong..got dental..so..yupx..jia you part C...i wan all of your come back as Second Sergeant!!!yupx!!!man i was drenched any way...cold....hmm..mugging time..hope tml get to play soccer...it's been years since i last smelled soccer...

2006-06-09T20:11:00.000-07:00

Yo back...lolx..as expected..world cup!!!SHIOK SIA!!!last night was sure heck of a male bonding time!!!went mal house..then played winning eleven 9..shiok sia..mal borrowed adaptor..played four ppl..song bo..then they wanna handicap..3 against me one...hha i won!!!then boos and me own sia..undefeatable!lolx...really fun sia..then got FIFA soccer street too...damn fun a lot tricks...

then match start at 12 mid night sharp...wah...shiok lor...so unexpected from Germany...start 5 minute score liao..then never really go into defence mode after that..still attack...their shots are like bullets sia..all the goals are far distance shorts....Zhao was late for the first goal...brilliant goal!!!lolx..

Damn exciting man...every one were shouting!!lolx...then soh and king got the itch on their leg and went on to test their skills at mid night in the living room..until mal's mom came and complain haha..poor mal..haha...

Yupx..matched ended with a score of 4-2....far from what i guess..but stil 2 goal diff right?lolx..but 4 goals from germany...really unexpected..or maybe should say 2 goals from Coasta Rica is really tyco...

Poland and Ecuador's match din really draw much interest...but think it was an upset for the poland side...cos when we were checking the scores some time it showed 1-0 to Ecuador...but well..aint the best players in the world so we had our very own Part Delta 05 winning eleven world cup tournament..BOSS and me owned with France lolx..then i went to mal's room to sleep...later gotta go HQ meeting..sian lar YCK leh!!!can die....mid year die liao..tonight england...NOW WE ARE TALKING!!!!!lolx

[[ Ok look..if i am tt bad..so i am wrong...you think??i am wrong to show ppl your messages which i did not!!!!!then you showed MY msges to some one totally out...totally diff generation...is right....if i was wrong...then it must be wrong to feel so guilty when i watched a movie with some one in the time you said you liked me and yet showing intimacy to some one else...so i was toying your feeling when u smsed some one else and after a while came back to me saying you will return and asked tt i would wait for you right..if i am innocent..i wont be telling ppl how guilty i feel for you...how wrong i was to you and in the end being called stupid...i was wrong when i faced every one you have behind you alone....ALONE!!no one..even him who pressurised me like shit...told my mom about it..not even myself..why??i wanted to protect some one who doesn give a damn about how i felt and what i went through..so i was wrong....so now i thought i should at least make things clear and finally agreeing my friends to speak up for me...it suddenly became tt i am being unreasonable and the idiot who announce things to the whole world!???!!!so who is tt person tt even smsed the outsider tt she sent a break up note and he kept in record and USED IT AGAINST ME!!!!????IT'S MY FAULT!!!!????SHIT!!]]

2006-06-09T05:23:00.000-07:00

SONG BO!!!!!!"operation world cup" will commence officially in 3 hours time!!!!!and i am leaving to meet malcolm and the rest for a night of excitment!!!can't wait!!!

Damn it..i am so gonna flop mid year!!!!i dunno why and how i got signed up for Spec course and tml will be the meeting in HQ...damn it...must squeeze time to mug...MUG MUG MUG!!!!LARRE CANNOT GIVE UP!!!you still have your project "shut the f up" lolx..sounds stupid lar but i see the end....BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND!!!!!!!

world cup world cup!!!!!!but tonight's match....Germany against Coasta Rica..Poland against Ecuador(is tt how u spell it??)...i think the score for Germany is 2-0....poland and Ecuador...hmm..hard to guess....maybe a draw or a one goal diff win..yupx...say say nia..i never buy...

Sia la good boy eh..dun bet one..haha...yeah!!ZAO LIAO!!!!OPERATION WORLD CUP PREPARATION STAGE..........COMMENCE!!!!!

2006-06-08T06:16:00.000-07:00

OK i am finally in a acceptable mood to blog about LTC...

B4 begin..i got a secret to share...shh..come closer....tell you hor....BINO ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Day one:
we gathered in school...friday...yupx..brought shiqi my sleeping bag which in the end heard gewn-Darling used it hahaha...she so blur through out the whole camp can???do flying fox can get rope burn??HOW!!!???and heard the gals all went gaga over her "chioness"...which part???lolx...yupx..got to know my group ppl better...

Binoculars: Shiqi
Serena
Elizabeth
Eee Fang
Pearlin
Jannah
Khairani
Han Chi
Wilberg
Ariffin
our hk friend Si Qi
Raymond
ME!!lolx

and the groups are :
Ab-Ace
Binoculars
Coconut
Despact
Euphoria
Fusion
Gladiators
Haha[(-_-)lolx]
Idiot's Guide ( 0.o )
Jellyfish
Kryptonite

first day din do much..got to know our friends more..but at night was the show..we took charge the night walk...it was so cool can???but it was so bright for a jungle..raymond me we stationed together in the bushes and jannah and han chi was some where in another station...we all fed mosquitos damn badly...i see blood all over me..then mosquitos even bite through the shirt..lolx..then got wild dogs some mroe..A LOT..7 of them and 2 wanted to charge at Raymond and me...another one followed me till it saw i was reinforced with Mr Foo and the rest...lolx..the MR Foo always appear at the right time with insect repellent..or else raymond and i would really die!!!and when finally he din appear...Ms Yong came!!wuth OIniment!!man it saved out lives!!!so shiok sia!!!Heaven is that simple man!!!

Day 2:
Had high elements the whole day...i overcame my fears by volunteering to be the first to go at many stations..but i still missed flying fox...would relaly like to compliment shiqi here..she really was afraid of height..but could really see her pushing herself to do some elements and especially flying fox!!WELL DONE FRIEND!!!=)..then we did rafting..the last time i built raft was in OBS..miss those days..but LTC is much mroe fun....the ppl are so supportive..BINO ROX LAR!!we are really a very very very united and well working group tt even Mr Chua and Mr Nathan was impressed and asked us to share our experience tt night..ABCDEFG B SOUNDS THE BEST TO ME!!!!!

Day 3:
Another day tt Bino shine..lolx..we had a long learning journey(lecture) lolx..and envisioning..yupx..and REACH exco being the first time participating the camp..were made to present...Abel and me lor..yar..then afternoon was dragon boat!!!wanted to sleep on the way there but end up playing intellectual games lolx..trickes and jokes..all got so high!!any way it was my first time dragon boating lar..i know we din get champion..but we did make it from 4th to 2nd!!!dun need to complain tt the instructor was just a lil too heavy for us to make it to champion..it's the team effort that we won!!!BINO AND COCONUT!!!BINONUTS!!!rox rox!!!yupx..and btw there were having the tp some surf board comp..man so many babes in bikini and hunks there..lolx....
then it was the night to remember!!!CAMP FIRE!!!what would a camp be without a camp fire right??it was really great...really crazy...shiqi was soo soo high!!!!the orientation spirit was back....we did all the mass dance!!!we sang all the cheer of the houses tt once were the greatest in our hearts tt no longer exist...

Castor!!!!(ROX!!!)
Alhena
Vega
Regulas

Miss the houses...LTC ROX!!

our new trend...

you want ah???say pleasE??

PRREEEEEAAAASSSSE???(in a very dia way)

nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnno!!!

Dun liddat lar~~~~(more dia)

nnnnnnnnnooo!!!

errrnnnnnnnn~~~~~(even worsely dia!!!!)

no!!!!!

Humph!!!!!(cross arm and act cute!!)

lolx rocks lar!!!JC PPL DO TT LEH!!!lolx

Then back in MJ was the emotional part..the photography ppl showed photos taken..and we wrote letters to each other tt we wanna thank...it's so sweet lar..receiving all the letters so encouraging...even received letters from other group members!!MJ family!!!

after LTC was really beaten..can u imagine..sleeping at plimplications to it..ask me personally about it...lolx ace when every 1 minute or 2 will have a plane like 747 flying like 100 metres above your bunk tt ur bunk will shake!!

So got home sleep...woe up some guy in ncc called me and said i signed up to go take Spect course??when???i was sitll half awake..kuku..

Then ate..palyed a bit and slept till 2 pm the next day...then Zul asked me go watch the Omen...sure..so we went with Michelle..ran into Mr Chua,Rong Xuan,Willie CJ and rachel..they jsut had student camp..so yar..then int he movie zul cracked a joke..."why would old auntie watch the omen???" lolx..michelle laughed till hysterical...yupx..nice show and had strong implications in it..ask me personally about it lolx..

And today went school for chem make up..study mode is back..then went ice skating with Jaryl,Fiona,Rachelle,Cui Fen and Jesper..i fell 3 times..right b4 we were about to leave..cos the surface got so rough tt i kept scratching hte ice and loss balance..and got some very very jia lat skin tear...lolx..stupid..heard paper cut...leaf cut..heard Ice cut b4??lolx..

ate jap fast food..then went home..on train played a lot intellectual games with cui fen..she got tricked like no body's business...lolx...relaly great friends..I love MJ....

2006-06-05T06:39:00.000-07:00

Just woke up from a well deserved sleep after LTC...

but i am not yet gonna start on my recount for LTC but..PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not think so highly of your daughter tt i am sticking on to her so badly...please do not think tt i am some low class bastard who plays with some one's feeling..especially your daughter's!!!PLEASE DO RESPECT MY INTEGRITY!!!please..if you wanna comment on my character..spend some effort knowing me and not just hearing it from some backstabber and be there scolding me!!GIVE ME A BREAK WILL YOU AUNTIE??please....If one person says I am an idiot who "cheats" on your daughter...why not spend some time ask AROUND and find out if what u heard was really true...and please..It's really just my luck tt both time i was back there in school you happened to be there...I AM NOT AS FREE AND NOTHING BETTER TO DO LIKE U THINK TO GO BACK AND DISTURB YOUR DAUGHTER..I HAVE A LIFE!!!!A VERY COLOUR FULL ONE WITHOUT YOUR DAUGHTER!!!!PLEASE!!!!

It ain't too much for me to ask for tt lil respect from you not to me but my integrity is it????how many time must you jump into conclusion about me before u finally know what kind of person I am???I don't have to spend any breathe trying to expain to you anything!!YOU CHOOSE WHO AND WHAT YOU BELIEVE and I CHOOSE WHETHER OR NOT TO BE TT KINDA BASTARD TO LIVE UP TO UR IMPRESSION OF ME!!!!I KNOW I CAN TOUCH MY HEART AND SAY I AM NOT TT SORT OF GUY..and ppl know too..IT'S ENOUGH!!!i don't have to argue with you face to face...YOU WILL FIND OUT!!not from me..BUT FROM FRIENDS WHO TRUELY UNDERSTAND AND KNOW WHO I AM....

So please...For God's sake!!!STOP regarding me as some really low classed bastard here ok??ARGH!!!!!!!

2006-06-01T09:37:00.000-07:00

Yo..today went school early to meet shiqi zul and gladys in the library to finish the movie we started the day b4..."MEAN GIRLS"...

Before i comment anything on the movie...i just like to say...LINDSAY LOHAN IS DAMN HOT!!!!!i mean HOT!!!...damn it why din i realise it??b4 this movie i just thought she's some young American actress with tons of frackles tt grew up in stardom and got fat...DAMN IT SHE'S HOT!!!and bitchy lolx..of course the actress playing the Queen Bee of plastic is hell-of-hottie too...

Yupx...well..from the movie i sorta see how girls can get so easily influenced by ppl around them..just be like them...and get really really bitchy...and they dun realise it...how a nice girl can change so dramatically just by knowing some bitchy friends..(i do know some..hee hee)..of course in reality u can't expect girls tt turned sluttish or bitchy to change just liddat...sigh...female politics just can never be understood by guys eh??lolx..but nice movie!!Half way Mr Hon always come in and kajiao cos he was having his Econs Consultation next door..his comments were like.."woo..hot...why..why am i teaching in Singapore..."then tt sluttish queen bee was saying wad half a virgin..i was like how do u define half a virgin..mr Hon was like" i pity u larre..tsk tsk tsk" like "sorry mr hon i am full virgin hahaa!!"

Then after the movie went to west plaza to with shiqi zul gladys and Sheraff(did i spelt it right??sorry..lolx) yar..then went 7/11...i bought my worldcup wrist band there..yar like fianlly..bought engliand and Brazil...just nice i wanted them and they have it there...brazil one is cool..so bright..i am not supporting them because i support champions..i support the game!!!they play really beautiful football...JOGA BONITO MY BRUZERS!!!

Then waited for number 3 cos it was raining..ran nto Edison and Tracy...and..we happily skipped maths lecture...i feel like a criminal...lolx...some friends i have ;)apparently we knew we wont catch any ball even if we went...lolx..so went back to library to hang out..thought can catch another movie but discussion room was occupied...by 3 ppl..watching X-man..-_-..watever..damn sianded in Library..

Din go for ncc today..the hand over today..cos of this..and tml will be LTC...cool...after so long another camp..like finally...yawnx...damn tired sia...after school went to Tamp central to deposite money..then along the way can buy winning eleven 10...and SONG BO!!I GOT IT!!!rushed home to try....cannot play..wtf..no wonder tt ah pek stopped me to give me the receipt just in case i need to change he said..he knew it right from the start din he??

on my way home was listening to MP3..and browsing songs..suddenly lost interest in all the songs...like dun have the urge to wanna listen to any particular songs any more..it suddenly hit me..YES!!it's about the time of the year Jay release his new album...yar..can't wait can't wait!!suprise us again man!!!and next year will be his concert..woohoo!!!sia la.........cheered up sia...ok..all ready for camp...

ciao

2006-05-30T06:55:00.000-07:00

Yo PPL!!lolx..today was the first day of make up lectures..sorta reached there on the Dot??lolx..interesting..

Yupx...first lecture and second one was hell cos the Aircon weren't switched on.the central computer is in holiday mode...lolx...last lecture bio was finally on..but goodness gracious me...i left my bio notes at home!!!!Sian...and happily homeostasis is over..and new notes came..DNA...lolx yup..

oH yar..after first lecture ZQ MZ and me thought it was break..and went canteen..lolx..then ZQ went to buy food while MZ and me went buy drink and there ran into Mei Xin..she was like you dun have math tutorial meh???like OMG!!lolx...then we called and recalled oh yar..lolx..but ZQ got his food liao..so literally swallowed the whole thing..almost with the plate man..lolx..

Whole day was giddy cos of the antibiotics..lolx..then during maths lecture Shiqi suddenly ask me to go TM for lunch..so ok lor..calling more ppl..and turn out..all AHS ppl..and Zul and Sha was with us but not until we have lunch..

This is the highlight..we went Pasta Mania and eat..shiqi shuning clarin junkwang and hui yuan lolx...then eat eat talk talk..stupid..ask me not talk about aple..i stop le..shiqi shuning and JK kept talking haha..nvm then we eat finish le..shiqi took the flavourin bottles and unscrewed...like so openly and clarin huiyuan and shuning that 3 goondus just din see!!!lolx..then kwang me and shiqi kept coaxing any one of they 3 to add some flavourin..then happily tt hui yuan..eat donkey years..pouring in half the containerful of cheese and still ahve half the baked rice left..then she took the chili..YES DRIED CHILI!!!!and want to pour..the we 3 "knowing-what's-going-on" ppl were trying so hard to maintain our laughing hormones lolx..then huiyuan picke dup and saw the cap loose..she screwed it even more loose with one finger and BOOM!!!more than half the bottle of dried chili landed on her plate..shuning and huiyuan screamed sia..then we 3 burst out till cannot maintain hahahahaha..then huiyuan throw tissue at me some more..wah liao..yuan wang ah!!not me!!!

Lolx...damn funny lar...then after tt went home..tired wanted to sleep..shiqi ask me sleep then she can wake me up..haha..nvm i thought i wouldnt..so sat in front com and watch naruto on youtube..cannot tahan..slept one hour..woke up shiqi smsed me"can wake up nor?" lolx..erm.....yar...reply in sleep hahahaha...then went back school met up with them to discuss the item we in charge of in LTC..yupx..fun.then shiqi's parents sent me home..lole her convo with her parents so cute lar!!!lolx..shit..why all parents so ke ai de...sigh...

haha...ok ok..tired...took antibiotics again..need rest...and jsut now when taking out the stupid capsule..felt a sharp pain..I GOT CUT BY THE BLOODY ALUMINIUN THING OF THE CAPSULE CONTAINER!!!HOW RETARDED!!!damn it..well it's antibiotic..so wont get infection ba haha..retarded..ok good night guys...=)

2006-05-29T07:20:00.002-07:00

Alrights..today a lot things to write..yes..

MOrning had our long anticipated GP paper...i wrote about the topic" The best way to assess one's ability is through examinations.What's your opinion?like DUH!!every single student in the right state of mind will DENY that right??

Paper 2 was desastrous....sigh...after which we went to hall where Mr Lee spoke to us about H3 subs...H3 Bio was called prolo sth sth sth...shiqi and me were pretty excited to hope to take it though we are trying hard in bio...but the criteria is scary..A for both sciences..and it was disappointing when we saw it's contents....it's nothing diff from organic chem..while H3 chem is so exciting..Pharmaceutical...drugs!!and physics too..quantum..teach u how to make bombs haha...

Whatever..be it i take H3 or not...i will work towards my goal..and get what i want..

Life really started after that...we went on learning journey organised in class level..306 goes to the CHINA TOWN MAN!!!"how exciting" -_-..lolx..but it's always fun with friends around though..discovered china town in a diff way..on the train Zhang Quan and me just sang and sang...lolx..even though i am in seriously bad flu and fever...(reason u will see later)could still sing lar so yar..fun trip..went there took a long time to finally settle down in BK for lunch....and that was our learning journey..lolx...we went excited when we saw this Erotica..adult toy shop..haha...lame..

Oh oh..ain got take sth home..she shopped lolx..

Ok..of course..the day ends with X-Man 3 at Shaws...damn it the theater is freaking big!!!the whole J1 was in it!!along with teachers and there are still many empty seats...it was a good movie..watching with such a great number of friends...i dunno why though..at points the ppl applauded...lolx..

Right..fun..and by right i should be going for NYAA meeting which i think is still on now..but my teeth was really killing me that i had to pang sei bing bing for dental visit...and called my mom to fetch me cos she was near by and she smsed me to say she's free these 2 nights..and tml night i am def not free!!!

Right..my day really ended....it was hell pain!!!i mean sorry but FUCK IT!!!the doc like gave me 6 injections to numb it and it was still pain..cos it was route canal treatment...still need to go back..my mom said she dare not see then went out..bloody...pain like shit!!!then after that..it costs 270 dollars..X ray..treatment and medication..for one teeth and i have one more..dun get me wrong..i brush teeth..may even be more frequent than some ppl out there but doc said it's inherited..can't be helped..sigh...

After tt he gave me strong pain killer and antibiotic..my fever probly caused by tt infection...so yar...went with mom to eat something b4 taking medication..the trenquilizer was subcisiding and it was giving me huge pain..as i walk and eat with my mom i was cursing and swearing like no body's business...until took the strong painkiller..and now it's much better..just hte numb part is giving a lil discomfort...lolx...

OK..tml i was given a MC..dun think i will use it though...see hwo everything goes...ciao guys...tt antibiotic and painkiller is really causing gastric now...

2006-05-29T07:20:00.001-07:00

2006-05-28T08:58:00.000-07:00

Met up with Mal,Boss,Bing,King and JZ again at around 5 sth jsut now to go Changi General Hosital visit jian wei...

He's lung punctured again..poor boy..when we went there he lying down there with his friends and mom around..then he saw us..gave us tt "you wan to eat?" hand sign..friendly guy..

He's always chanting to us how boring it is there..with lights out time at 8..wardmates all old old ah peks..looking seriously ill...he's considering whether to listen to doc's recommendation to go do the major operation in SGH..better go lar brother..health more important..so wat stay a few more days and cannot make it for ur Taekwando Exco??recover and join us for WORLD CUP MAN!!

Poor thing staying is C ward or was it D ward with no TV and air-con..he jsut kept chanting sian sian sian to us...poor boy..i think i will die there..good thing he got many mag..YUyang gave him Maxim..man..his mom open sia..invite us to read..lolx.then bing bing wanted to buy but duno where to hide..lolx..

But he's cool...so chill man..still can say jokes to us..damn cold lar..dunno whether he's realyl cool or he's hiding..i realised...girls like to break up at their own happy timing..often when the guy need her them most...selfish man..maybe there are exceptions..yet to meet some lolx..took me long enough to recover man.hha..recover soon ba jian wei..then we can have fun during World Cup season!!can't wait man!!

Tml GP paper..and Learning Journey..my class going Siloso issit??heck..after which is X-Men 3 then NYAA meeting again..wootx..god bless me..i caught a cold now..

2006-05-27T08:25:00.000-07:00

Just had NYAA meeting at my house..with part D'05 ppl...had steam boat too prepared by my mom...it's great cos all of us enjoyed ourselves and ate to our fill..Thanks Mal and Bing for coming early and mal for buying the drinks..

Today i think so far most number of ppl turned up lar..though still got ppl couldnt make it for meeting due to many reasons but still..for the past 2 meetings...things went on well..with ALMOST every one getting serious into discuss and planning..Soh of course..needs some more cooling down from whatever thing he's been thinking since years back..lolx..ANd dunno why malcolm was acting stupidly since just now too..he's so high today...acting childish...acting cute *pukes*..but never the less..he offered his house to us for WORLD CUP!!how exciting..all of us are going to his place to watch WORLD CUP!!!just can't wait!!!this world cup season aint gonna be lonely!!lolx so who's jealous???WORLD CUP WORLD CUP WORLD CUP....

It's great tt we can still gather as a big group every now and then after graduation..and it's great to see all doing well in our diff institutions...wonderful...lolx...miss those NCC days..when we suffered and sweat together...been through so much..bond so much and this is the result we really cherish..

Alright..tml will be my official mugging day for GP...then monday will be the first ever EXAM i take in MJ after which it's a COLLEGE OUTING!!man..whole college...going around on our self-organised learning journeys and whooe college cramp into Bugis cineleisure for X-Men III....i see another opportunity for us to bond..=)

It's really not about the college...not about how scary MJ is...it's about friends..who stands by you to support you through ups and downs..=D

Sorry shiqi couldnt make it today to study with you guys..but over this holi we shall all mug hard and get the results we desire...cheers!!

And sorry to end this entry with a sad note..it's really saddening to hear tt Joan Chua the ex-RGS NCC just passed away in her sleep due to tongue cancer..she fought a tough fight and indeed she won...she left with no pain..spent the last days of her life spreading the words of God and love from him and finally taken away by him to be by his side..she'll be dearly missed by all of us..Rest in peace Joan..

_____you really dun deserve what i've been doing for you...while i really dun deserve how u've been treating me-

2006-05-25T07:06:00.000-07:00

Today was finally the day..

I am sad to announce that we lost to VJC with a score of 4-2...

But we aint sore losers like how VJC ppl behaved last year when they lost to us..we din walk away..we stayed and cheered on...even though we were sad and disappointed..we cheered on...we sang the college anthem with pride...second isnt tt bad...plus we fought with only 10 players on the field..when our best defender was sent out of pitch..

First half we lead 1-0..VJ equalised in second but soon we took the lead again..with a wonderful goal..from MR No 35..national player..dribbling pass 3 and took a clean shot....

OUr Goal keeper did well too...Jay Khoo fouled in penalty box and got sent off..our keep saved the penalty!!!tt's so great!!Keeping MJ alive..

I have to say our cheering really don lose to VJ...our spirit is high..

I am really not the only person speaking highly of MJC...it's worthy of it..Ms Lai is really a nice principal..firs tto go down to the field to touch our players head was her..cheering them on..and of course..declaring tml a holiday!!!lolx..

Yar..whatever you say...the PEOPLE you know that I don't know..or maybe every body dunno....

MJ is commercialised??oh please...how often do u see MJ on paper??how much flashy and fancy news u see???Ms Lai is not a principal with integrity???forcing teacher to change mark to drop a student out??OH PLEASE!!you are just a sour grape tt she made it this far as an successful educator!!any one with eyes will be able to tell how much she respects students and teachers...

If one isnt proud of the school one chose and belong to...well..then get lost...we dun need this kinda person here...if one get good result when one is not even thankful for the ones tt guided him/her???like YING SHUI SI YUAN??then ask urself do u deserve anything??

So if MJ brings down cut off point is to attract students is losers' act...then some ppl over charge ppl to make ppl think they are of good service and quality is wise man's move??when one puts a blame of such low class ideas on ppl..one must first have this idea and carried out by oneself first right??tt's the psychology aint it??Unless u are of no sin..u are in no position to judge alright??so please..tell me u are holy..

Ok..i was very devastaed when MJ lost cos suddenly thought of how some ppl will comment about MJ again..Meridians love MJ to the extent that those criticisers can never imagine..the tears...(shi hui,ain,michelle dun cry...we will win again..it's the game and the sportsmanship that matters=)cheers!)Tt's the MJ spirit tt i belief is just attractive to all who have been in MJ b4...yupx..

MJC MJC GOOO!!!!

Another patriotic entry lolx..heck..tml free day lolx....yahoo!!!!

2006-05-24T05:35:00.000-07:00

Hmm ok..today was kinda suprising..pleasantly..

There was a call for all REACH reps to be in contaner classroom for a compulsary meeting...i thought what...go there..sat with Kimmie and Tze Shan...yar closest with they two...when compared with others lolx..yar..then saw Ms Soh writing on the white board about electing REACH exco...and there it goes..my name there as nominee...random??

Yar did a short speech with every one..and sent out as they vote..come back..great!!i'm in!!!and then kimmie told me i got the highest vote??Ok lar..i am keen on running for P too..i wont promise anything but at least try my best to make CIPs in MJ more fun ba...Thank God for the opportunity..given to me through teachers and other fellow REACH reps..hope i will do a good job no matter in what position and glorify his name...

any way i dun thik it's a brilliant idea to just chunk all CIPs to do after A level...like...a bit fake right..doing it for the sake of doing..

That's not the point..point is..i have ta go for LTC!!!Leadership Training Camp...hope it will be fun but how??4 days!!how!!??I NEED TO STUDY!!!!

nvm..now in a sian mood..tml no need hand in any work according to anna..so no mood to do anyhthing..sitting in front of the comp looking at happy tree friends..nanananananananananana!!!-_-..

Tml will be soccer final..really looking forward to it..hope we really can win then friday will be a full day off!!!well if we dont..at least a half day..so..does tt mean at least a half day off is guaranteed???hmm..tml whole school will be going down to support..go MJ soccer!!!

And please..if u hear some asshole talking lowly about MJ and shooting Ms Lai tell him to come speak it out loud and not talk in the comfort of his own shelter thinking he's God there!!frog in the well..remember..the only time when u look down on some one..is when u are pulling him up..but please..OH-PLEASE..he's way too low down there trying to boost himself up there..save the breathe man..

Pretty easily frustrated these days..whatever..holiday's coming..wait..is there such thing called holiday for JC???like what is holiday??can it be eaten??like camps..make up lectures...Mr yeow just told us there will be a day which we have 2 consecutive bio lects...tt's adding up to like..2 days of such 110 minutes full of sitting there listening to talk..for bio and one more day for chem..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!i need more happytreefriends..

2006-05-23T05:46:00.000-07:00

Yar i know..tml is the wonderful bio test..and guess what..i am less than halfway through..and i just feel like blogging..

Firstly..i got sth i just really dun understand...whenever there's some politics..i really dun wanna take any side..and be any extreme..like please..leave me out man lolx..

Ok..yar..Realised JC really very political...true tt MJ nutures leaders...but leaders are not only the ones tt stands above all and command ppl...

Just to share sth i learnt ba...hope it's of any use to any one...

From my sec school..i learnt some good values from NCC..

There's basically 5 types of leadership..

Firstly..ppl follow you because they have to...due to rankings and positions.

Secondly..ppl follow you because they want to...because they feel u are a leader..

Thirdly..ppl follow you because of what you did for them..cos they wanna be greatful

Fourth..ppl follow you because of what u did for the world/population/organisation..because you are really doing the action...

Last but not least...ppl follow you because of who u are..i dun have to elaborate on this do i?

I dunno if i sequenced them right..but..it's relaly about servant-leader and not just a leader-leader...one may be a president of a country..but when his country men doesn like him or respect him as who he is..they may still partition him..so far i think MJC councilors are doing a good job..no matter what..just entering the office..all takes time..this is just a point to share tt i think is really good since once out of the school..we really will have to start struggling in the society...yupx..

And..just went on friendster..realised...she has changed....100%...360 degree...totally...to some one..tt i din know..i never know..and never would have thought her to become...i guess...it's called growing up...

Ppl dun learn when not hurt...can't bear to hurt her but still hope the learning takes place..impossible..

To 306..jia you and mug hard for midyear!!=)our clas sis great man!!!we have so many chairpersons and captains in the class...lolx..class of leaders...haha..

Time for coffee...and bio...done with respirtaion..done with cell signalling....photosynthesis...COME TO PAPA!!!!I CAN'T TAKE ANOTHER FAILURE OR I AM REALLY GONNA RETAIN!!!!larre..remember..your project "shut the f up" is still not complete...do it well..do a clean job!!!

2006-05-22T05:20:00.000-07:00

Damn tired sia today..thought over the weekend had enough sleep..sigh..

Woke up this morning..when styling hair realised oh my..the hair is sooo long and thick!!!there's no way i could do anything to it...

So determined..no matter how broke i am..i am gonna get it cut like TODAY!!!

Good news came.."good news" morning assembly...uncle choy announced that my class is chosen to support the badminton semi-final at JURONG!!!like wtf..thanks..

So go lor..ont he bus took a few pictures for victor..lame lar..then i fell asleep..must have looked stupid cos Isabelle,XX gwen and sean were laughing their heads off...bad hair day haha..

Yar support lor..i think we were so bad..like they were cheering inside..then we went KFC to liek slack..until uncle choy came..sorry shiqi...

Yar..then after tt i quickly ran back..on the way met jia xian and van and many TJ friends ba..from ahs and CLT course..APRIE!!!lolx..

Yar..sadly we lost to TJ in a crucial match...lost to Zachery...well it was a good game..a tough fight..in the end i was joined with other 3 CLTs from 50th to cheer for MJ..yar..it was really exciting lar..though we din make it into the finals for badminton..thursday will be soccer finals against VJC...i am really looking forward to it..though many rumours are going around saying MJ wil not be able to beat VJ again..but hey..isnt MJ famous for making wonders??

Yar..match finish 4 sth already..sianx...took MRT with class ppl to Bedok..like BEDOK!!on the train we had great fun chatting and stuff..i was really tired..could feel the oxygen dept in me causing the fatigue..but who cares..i am finally getting my hair cut..

Yar went to vincent place...along the way..seen so many famimliar sites..a bit....watever..

Finally Vincent complimented on my hair..finally kept this length for him to cut happily haha...yar lor..i want some colour on my hair...wellx...

ok gotta go squeeze bio into my head b4 i fall asleep...ciao..

2006-05-19T23:17:00.000-07:00

Ok just got back from Innova JC..for that Racial Harmony day Anchor Event...

My mom sent me there..like WOW...lolx..yar got there it was like..OMG..the school is bloody big!!!right beside sports school..the place is very very ulu lar..so it's so huge tt it's like some uni or poly compound...and it's a city on it's own..gosh..

But their clasrooms are so...primary school and sec school like..some pentagonal table...some sec school type of table while the grills on the lower compartment is removed..like..what's the purpose of having it then???

It's CCA rooms are like...a structure by it's own like an independent building..and they call it the Innova Street...omg...OMG!!!

Yar..and CJC uniform is so alike ours tt..every one sorta confused..even some one from MJ himself..lolx...and i think one of the councilor in IJ was from TNS..but well..forget liao lar..

Saw Samantha..from CLT course one..SAJC...all i can say is..the only ppl tt were high today were the VJ ppl...like..typical..cheering every where they go....

So yar..finished 12.sth still ok lar..even though i still doze off...during talks and stuff...if i wasn smsing..sure will sleep like Hairizuan..lolx..

yar..kinda depressed still..listening to songs..like..when alone...life just sux some time doesn it???

Dont u just wanna die some time???

2006-05-19T07:08:00.000-07:00

Today quite boring actually..same boring day..yupx..MIng Zhi a bit high today haha...math lecture we were like all KBing the lecturer...

Btw..sean..please..she doesn look like cyndi Wang!!NEVER!!lolx..

Then learn learn half way ming zhi suddenly exclaimed "shit i'm going to cry already!" i was like "why?" he went " i dun get a single thing" and yes..he get replies from every where saying "don't worry..me neither..."lolx

Wanted to go back AHS today..a few of us wanted..but boom..got to know it;s their holiday!!like...wth!!!???then too bad lor..so..after school sat at study benches slack a lil..some thing tt's really a luxury in MJ...yar...then CIndy and Constance came over saying they wanna go Tamp eat and asked me along..so ok lor...not in a mood to go home..

So went to walk walk..then yar..ran into a number of ppl ba..first on da list was jia wei lor..lolx..yar then malcolm..

And Jeslyn and Jayne...and friends..(and dun worry i din think tt ur were following me or "Stalking" so yar relax lar haha...) yar and Cindy from SAC...

Saw Adriano...Gosh...typical ah beng with a group of ah beng friends sitting outside the CS arcade...Ironically..i was the firs tto spot them in the group...

Btw b4 this we met up with Dazzle zhi rong and Malcolm..so 6 of us walked along..lolx..Good day!!

Yar..kinda cool lar..like AHS gathering..so many ahs ppl..so many MJ...then ran into matthew too lolx...

Tml got this racial harmony thing i signed up..it's sth like to go take sec 2 and p5 students on for a trail and tml will be my first session of briefing at Innova JC...8.30...how am i gonna get there!!

And yar saw another campus superstar..the one from RJ...geek...lolx..whatever...seems like now girls like ah bengs...u know..yuyang...adriano..

I think i support only 2 ppl..now..though a bit late..from campus super star...one is Evonne...like duh..my pri school friend lehx!!some more she remembered me..

Then Zhiyang lor..though a bit gaying and act cute but hey..my friends' friend and kael told me he got 24 out of 25 for his H2 econs...like wtf...

ok..busy weekend..hope tml i still have energy for airport study or sth...sigh...

Larre you are not tired!!you are NOT!!!!oh watever..

2006-05-18T06:08:00.000-07:00

Oh hi...today was indeed a long day...really long..and really tired...

Had some fun too..in the library during lunch,De sheng and Jon let me heard this new Mr Brown show thing..this time he's making fun abou that cradit card commercial.."Free more birds,More luck"...it wa slike in Hokkian lar..which i din udnerstand..

Until Desheng slowly said it to me then i realised...haha..yar...Lam Seh Eh Chiao....Uncle Wa Ai Lam Chiao!!hahaha

Eh Le mai ga wa gong chiao wei ah!...lolx..wah damn funny sia..laughed in the library..quite bad lar..lolx..

Then went to watch soccer..at CCAB..Bkt Timah..omg...was saw shiqi cheering her heart out sia..lolx..i never see it b4...maybe cos i wasnt from her OG..lolx so interesting..

Yupx..what can i say??we won again..even without our full star team...

MJC 1 : 0 JJC

The finals will be us again!!!against VJC again..we must clinch it one more time!!YES!!DO IT MERIDIAN!!!

Saw a lot of friends there..like omg..wei sheng..juin hoe...cheryl...kenneth...and J2 friends. from ahsncc..Ivan..Timothy..Jairyls(forgot how to spell lolx)..Jeremy...yupx..and pri school friends..Charles..din see Joel though..lolx..yupx..and..saw another ivan..lolx..some one i dun even know..just know he's Ivan..watever..

And NO...that was Ain...my classmate..we arnt together and will not!!!so please....ok nvm..haha....

Took a what seemed forever journey home...brrrr..now i am dead beat...still got bio concept map and tutorial to do..jia you ba...

My hair is long..and i am too broke this month to get it cut...this feels like shit..when hair suck..the day suck..

Tt's all..peace off..

2006-05-17T06:06:00.000-07:00

Ok i am here again...today had Chem SPA..first ever spa...

Shuning..dun say what u panic and saw i write so confidently..please..when 80 percent of the class were writing confidently i was still busy titrating!!how can i not keep wrting haha..

after all both our answer wrong i think...lolx..sighx...nvm..dun think too much..work hard and strive better the next one...yeah??

I admit i was a bit panic jsut now...a lil bit..or maybe cos the bottle containing the KMnO4 too light..it was a bit shaky..other than tt all ok lor..yupx..

Hmm..nothing much today lar..just keep wondering..and thinking of stuff..

Oh yar..today council investiture..lolx all teh way shiqi!!jia you jia you!!!btw why u look so pale on TV!!!??i mean screen...but shuning yanhong they all surely not excited to see you de..screamed like how they always do haha..yupx..jia you jia you chio bu!!"chio" bu!!!lolx..

Any way i think I should relaly thank God for bringing me to Meridian...bringing such great friends into my life...shiqi,Shuning,Zul,Chuilaam,Sermin...Junkwang..yuquan...kahwee..and many many more..i was so blinded some times tt i missed out on appreciating you guys..tt i've never said a thankew to you all for being in my life...yes dazzling..ahtan..zhirong u all too..thought it's only recently we started talking and stuff but it's been great too..

Some time i was just so into the grievance some asshole had given me..some stupid lousy totally wrong reputaions he has capped on me jsut to bring me down..I dunno how to say it out and i kept it all to myself..making me always wonder why did all these happen to me and just wanna die..

Friends like u guys pulled me out from the pit of darkness and despair,letting me know that i am not such an worthless idiot tt i was once brainwashed to be..

So i just liek to say thankew to all u guys..may we be friends for life!!

Oh yar Jeslyn..thanks for treating me as a friend now..not that u've treated me as sth else but it's been pleasant knowing you..recently i really changed my thoughts about u..u are quite nice actaully lolx..yupx..all the best for ur O'level..SAC isnt a bad school lar lolx..

That's all ppl...see ya!

2006-05-16T06:36:00.000-07:00

Alright i i dunno why i still have the time and mood to blog when tml is my spa...SPA!!!A LEVEL EXAM!!!

Today bio prac we used micro-pipettor...though not the first time but still as exciting...lolx..yupx.

NOthing much happened...during chinese lesson went to library with shiqi and shuning...surely..they were so desperately trying to get rid of all things related to her from me..

even just an apple i drew on a piece of paper..and..I LSOT MY RULER!!!!not that 30 cents matter to me..but..it's THAT PARTICULAR RULER!!!!!with her writing and memoried...LOST IT!!!!

Shiqi was like..tian yi..tian yi..then they two were like..aiyo if i break up i will dump everything away i think they are irritating...shuning was like chunk all to mom..

Suddenly just hit me..all those things..tt i still treasure..may long be thrown to Tua and incinerated...the ring tt cost a bomb??may long be melted or thrown...just.....yar..and thought of what i got yesterday..

I am sorry alright??sorry for being frank with my feelings..it's not sensitive..not just me..just that i dunno how to hide my feelings..i will work on it..give me time..i am sorry for having this stupid name called Larre ok???I am sorry for existing???

Then shiqi was like..yeah..imagine one day she gets married..becomes some one else's wife...Mrs sth sth...i din hear her go on and put on my ear piece and listen to music and went into my own world..

Stoned a while..had some stupid urge...held back..all gone...

Time to study..oh yar i haven eat dinner..

Yes ming zhi is right..i felt it too..i was so outdated with some details of the GPP that i really contributed very very lil..sorry to have added on so much work load to u guys...anna eugene and ming zhi..yupx i will keep myself updated and work harder on it from now on..

Ok..done...tonight will be a tiring night..tml will be battle..

She.....maybe one day will be a history..like what i am...already..

ciaox..good luck to ur all for SPA tml..jia you jia you!!!

Shiqi is still at council investiture rehearsal..until 11 i think..so poorthing..tml is such an important event..God bless her...please..yupx..cyax

2006-05-14T08:42:00.000-07:00

Well second post of the day...yeah..went to k box just now...how nice...with mom and step dad...step bro and his gf...

I feel so out lar..though my bro and his gf are nice..Carol is really friendly and easy-going..we do catch up with words pretty easily..but it's just so out...

They are like so sweet now....sorta seeing them getting married...

Sorta...seeing myself..bringing her there to sing..and to wash the bowls together after a meal...

Morning coming out from church..kael was like randomly asking me..have u ever thought of getting married with some one??

Of course...aint it obvious??and yar it's still her...she was like..oh my god..why are u still loving her so much??i dunno...some times it may not really be purely love..some times u feel so attached to some one..tt..u just..missed out a part of ur life...when she is gone..yar..

It's really nice to be around her cos we are really best friends and she knows all my past and so do i know about hers..so we could talk every thing..comparing PE and apple..and stuff...yar..

Din really sing...dare not ask for all the sad songs..sang all the happy and sweet songs...duet with Carol...Lee Hom songs..Julia..and stuff....sigh...

I need a miracle in my life father!!I REALLY REALLY DO!!!i need a break through...

Happy mom day to all mom's...spiritual mom...real mom..biological mom..fake mom..whatever..

Happy mom day to Pinky's mommy...

Most importantly..happy mama day to poohie's mommy...miss you tons...yet...(*laughs*)..wishes were sent but to no avail...hope she knows it son..=) Do you know tt the mom day present u gave my mom is still kept so dearly by her??i was shocked today too..all the things u've given her..can be kept she kept..lolx...

So all....it's been a lame day...and another sad day...tear to sleep again..nights...

2006-05-13T22:51:00.000-07:00

Went to morning English adult service with kah leng just now...first time going tt perticular service..pretty different from what i thought..

Any way...relaly had no mood...we were late lar..it's like 9 in the morning??when it used to be 9.30..so wrong info to kael..sorry..but still the security guard let us in..so thank god...

Yar..Pastor Melvin Mak did devotion..today's message was about...letting go of some past thing...sth liddat..

About Elijah and Elisha..some times there's some much in life that we can't get just because i can't let go of the past..then comfort from it...

I dunno if God is speaking to me..

After service went parkway Mos Burger for lunch with kael..she treated it as breakfast...well..

Yar..later going to karaokae with mom and her friends..honestly speaking..i really really REALLY!!dun wanna go....come on where's the mood to sing???

She's been like reminding me for the past 2 days or so..."eh..sunday mothers' day ah..go out and celebrate hor!!"

Wth can i say no???sorta envy kael cos her mom doesn celebrate mom day..

So after MOs Burger..we took bus home..i offered to walk her home as per usual...she insisted i don't..well..we are too good friends already so ok lor...since i was on 14..then i can conveniently take tt bus to bedok INT..

Pretty wrong..cos...14 drive pass a lot A LOT of places...listening to songs..and was like..into my own world again...at bedok INT was waiting for 28..i was looking around..esp toward the direction of MRT station...i dunno..i relaly relaly was hoping something will just happen...so many back views tt looks so strange yet familiar some wat...

Dared not blink an eye afraid i might miss out sth...was i plainly being stupid??

Will things be better???

2006-05-13T03:20:00.000-07:00

Last night went to airport to study with zul chuilaam and shiqi again..yupx...

Sorry about the black face when i went to see your...right b4 i left house....i got some really really depressed...

Yar..what's the whole world for..if tt one person tells u to buzz off??

Really damn depressed...damn sad..going airport..listen to music..all the sad songs...so quiet..it was already close to midnight..i fell into my own world...and tears just wanna come out..sat on bus...found a chinese newspaper of tt day..so read...then came to below the highway tehre..there was an accident...

A bus..hit a scooter...the 2 ppl on the scooter died...lying apart on the floor...then families just came and were crying so badly..shaking their bodies...

I was so devastaed when i saw it..my bus like drove right pass it so i could see really clearly the scene...

What's his family going to do???which made me think about that point again...

What will happen to the person i love...if one day i die and leave her..cos when i know when we love each other and we are so interdependent..it's not the death of your partner tt scares you..is your own...tt u afraid u can't take care of her any more..

Or maybe...your life will be much brighter and happier if i die??

Yar witnessing death isnt a happy thing...so...plus..yesterday spent the whole day at malcolm's house doing NYAA...and we crazy playing PS2 after tt..Mao Ma(mal's mama) very nice..cook steam boat for us sia...very nice lor..her cooking oso not bad..

Lolx next time my turn..my mom cook tt si chuan ma la steam boat..shiok ah!!lolx...

yupx..so got home this morning at 9 sth..morning went to chuilaam house to pei shiqi take her shirt...yar...then walked to 17 bus stop to take bus..her house is like beside ahs lar...a block to remember too...

Walked a road tt really really brings back a lot of memories..seeing all the familiar yet some what unfamiliar places...it feels like i've not been here for ages...everything changed..and yet when i looked around...nothing seemed to have changed...

It just seemed so empty........a hole..

Shiqi was pretty depressed this morning too...she's very very depressed...which is pretty scary cos it's super ununsual..she's relaly too tired i think..so take a good rest ok??yupx..jia you jia you ba..you can do it!!

OK now returning to my depressed life...see you guys...

here a pic we took..while getting out from airport..to take bus..shiqi suddenly feel like taking some pictures..so here it goes..i looked super toot..

2006-05-12T08:06:00.000-07:00

What's the use of having done so much..though having friends supporting you on and love from ppl..tt really brightens my life..

When the one u need the support from the most..tells u to get lost??

The whole world jsut seemed soo weightless and pointless all of a sudden...

I just wanted to see you smile...is it that difficult??and impossible??

Just the courage..and then chance to tell u u are the only one..

And you can really make me feel so worthless...

2006-05-11T08:17:00.000-07:00

Yo people!!

Alrights..music extrodinaire was a HUGE success!!!First of all must thank YAN HONG!!!it's really been a wonderful experience participating with you!!!effort we put it really halped us to enjoy the night right??U DID GREAT!!!yupx..jia you jia you for ur other areas(studies and cca lolx)

and yar thank chinese society for organising this competition...Kok Ann...Yee Chuan..you guys are great!!yupx...

and of course thank you guys sooo much for coming down to support me and screaming my name out to let me know you guys were there!!thank you so much!!!

It doesn matter if we din win anything in the end but we had a great time din we!??yeah man!!

Congrates to all the winners!!!exp rock band..you guys deserved the awards...without ur..the night wont be what it was...SO HIGH!!!!

Thanks to Eugene for helping me taking some pics...thought video cam can't work lolx..but thank you very much =)

Thanks to Shuning for recording down the music for me though it ended up with a lot of ur screaming lolx..thank you =)

Shiqi thanks for coming down and sit there screaming for us too...really!thanks haha...best friends man..

but hor..why u so lame after tt...please where got many girls like me or say i'm "hot" it's not the word for me ok??lolx..then so lame..come down trying to spike ur friend by doing all those funny things..mean sia..VP LEH!!lolx kidding kidding relax lar..

Went home with shiqi then on the bus a lot of cold jokes man..first time she laugh until so high sia..shocked lolx..chilll man chill..

NOw life returns to normal..yar zhi yang came...ok lar..liddat lor..his answers a bit lame lar..lolx..tt's all the comments i have about him...lolx..

Yeah and my attire....hmm though spent quite a sum but in the end the response were so good..so yar money well spent...

Yar yar thanks shuning and ahtan...for the choice of brown shirt...i din reject ok??i just considering...then asking for more opinions...from erm...yar lar..then she same good taste as ur...so picked it so yar thanks lar..lolx..

So yar back to life..mid year still coming...like still goes on...it's equally stressful haha...ciao guys..thankew very much!!!=)

2006-05-10T03:05:00.000-07:00

Spent a moody day...

Totally no mood...

Totally devastated..

Totally pissed...

Today Jacq came MJ....shocked to see her...like...so tall now...and i mean...damn it....she's tall!!!

Yar she's here to sell MI funfare ticket...10 bucks..lolx no money larx...

Just now went to tamp central walk alone..listen to music....just walk and walk...and.....haunted by a lot of thoughts.....a lot..and...

Some time i really just wish i can die...like LARRE!!!FUCK YOU!!YOU SUCK!!!damn it....damn it...

Sorry for the vulgarities but just...sigh.....forget it....

2006-05-09T06:06:00.000-07:00

Where got cook half way suddenly no appetite??

Where got take a few bite then threw away every there..

Where got gastric coming back??

Where got depression coming back??

Where got feel like crying??

Where got can't sleep tonight??

Where got feel stupid??

Where got feel like dying??

Where got eat a bit only feel like vomitting??

Where got pain??

WHERE GOT!!!!!!???????????

2006-05-09T05:07:00.000-07:00

Congrats to shiqi as the Vice president of MJC 4th Student council...and allt he exco members..

I'm in no mood to do anything...my greatest fear and worry...actually came true...though i sort of expected it to happen but still...why???

ARGH!!!!!!!!!I WANNA DIE!!!!!!!!

2006-05-08T07:48:00.000-07:00

I'm so sick of life...Sick of some bastard backstabs...sick of some asshole just doesn wanna let me free...

Like i am finally picking back my life..being blinded by ur idiotic thoughts tt i am totally useless...just because u dun like me...finally making new friends..getting supports from friends..you made me such a paranoia...

Can't u just let me free??Yes what goes around comes around but WHEN!?ppl are still being deceived...still worships him..like..where's the justice!??

I'm so sick of all these...GOD WHERE ARE YOU!!!???why let the evil reign!!!???why???why retrain me from all that revenge i wanna take??WHY???U told me u will do it..but when???i can't take it already father....

RJ forced a draw with us today...but i can see tt we din play with full effort...Adrian din even play...Guoguang went up...immediately time up...yar losers RJ...why tear???u guys still squeezed your ass into semifinal....face it...it's 5-1!!!losers..

I think ai m the loser...i just can't be bastard enough to make him have a taste of his own medicine..I swear...if i got a chance..i will get tt apology from you...just like how my mom apologized to me!!!I WILL TAKE WHAT I DESERVE..and so will you!!YOU LUCIFER!!!

I am not afraid..with strength from above...u used God's name in vein and denied him while claiming tt u are christian!!??IT WILL COME DOWN HEAVY ON YOU!!!wait and see...i dun belief is retributions...i belief in judgement...of God...

If i cry...i know it hurts...but do you???i'm so sick of being treated so randomly...I'm stuck in a dilemma..that no one knows...how it feel...that you dun even care!!!

2006-05-07T06:24:00.000-07:00

ok ok i try to keep this short..

Last night went to study with chuilaam,Shiqi and zul..i can say it's the most productive study night so far..cos felt the stress lar..

Yar...then the manager was the good and nice manager shiqi mentioned..true enough he din turn up the radio at night and he even delivered ice water for us..and asked us for orders...yupx..so nice..

My wonderful EQ zero dad screwed himself again..he proven again he's EQ is really ZERO...great thing my mom staying in hotel now...LOSER...

yupx this is short...

2006-05-05T22:17:00.000-07:00

Ok..i finally got it done..as in corrected so i shall like..blog about thursday and yesterday ya??

Thursday nothing really great happened...a super long day for me...and for every one tt's in the finals for Music extrodinaire....I thought it was just a school thing but turned out the teacher told us it isnt so small..

It's very very serious..she criticizes the dresses of some girls..she thinks tt my white blazer with orange inside it weird...thinks tt some girls shouldnt wear skirt cos their thighs are not nice...blah blah blah..

Said tt Zhi Yang is coming..to sing 22...like no one care haha..except pearlicia maybe...we all planning to take some egg lolx..yupx rehearsal till like 8 sth..quite fun lar turned out..yupx..yan hong was cold so she wore my blazer..lolx kinda funny...

Yups got home at 9 sth then did bio concept map till like 12 then sleep...yawnx...

Friday...

Nothing unusual happened...just as normal...then after school should meet mr lau so tt he can teach me Gases..but he went to relief a chem prac...pang seh me...then jun kwang last period tell me he forgot to print my PI for me..thanks bro...quickly go chiong library..re-typed the whole thing handed in..Mr cheong oso..must say until so nan ting.."so your remember ah..he sa bo your group because his friend sa bo him.."thanks lor...

Well watever..then re-typed it using like 45 minutes..then handed in..he oso never say anything..other classes all never hand in so we are still fast i guess??then went to return anna her diskette..kena drag into the ava room do the ball juggling thing...lucky i learnt during sec 2 in ncc Camp FEAST lolx..then inside lame diao lar..take photo..like a lot AHS inside....Mei xin...Shuning..Clarin..Chen En..Hui Yuan..Karen..yar turn out like supposed to aanna teach us...turn out jonathan de sheng and me teach her lolx..

After tt i left..call Eng chang see wanna watch movie..he said MI3..so ok..i go...but i wsa there damn early..cos he like playing lan..and suddenly i thought oh shit..cannot..the day b4 i was with him there..later ppl think we colin and kero sia...tt 2 freaking gays..make me feel damn weird going out with guys sia...so quickly call more ppl..all cannot..then clarin told me they plan to go Mei xin house watch Exorcism..so ok i go..then thought no one at home can come my place watch..so yar..ec came like after 1 hour..i went popular bought folder book and ink refill while waiting and ate dinner too..he came le then we went to meet the 4 girls..then they eat at KFC..-_-..

Yar lar then i said i think i need to buy a shirt inside to pei so we go see lor..then go try...U2 there tried and talked a lot rubbish there..then apple replied me...like after a week...yar..wadever..haha..

Then went 77th street they clarin said brown..i sorta like..hmm ok??but not very nice and it's ex..then i asked apple..she said brown too....i thought she would say orange...but she said i am not tanned enough..sorry hor..i not tt YU YANG...bloody ah beng act cute..pukes..

Then told clarin then they liek oh ok lor..we all say u dun listen apple one person say u listen...*roll eyes*

then we went to the DVD renting machine..lolx it's very cool seh...i signed up an account in it...put in 10 bucks...broke....so cool..scan my ic and stuff...then one dvd came out..

so yar lor..watched Exorcism of Emily Rose.....not exactly scary kind of scary...it's more like...makes me spiritually stronger..i think tt's the initial motive of the director ba..and it's a true story...in it..emily oso chose to came back to suffer cos Mother Mary told her she could choose to leave peacefully with her to heaven or she can go back and because of tt more ppl will come to know the Realm of God is real..he said how can any one not belief in God if i show them the devil...it's really touching..

so while watching i sorta preached to shuning they all..yupx..then by the end of show it's like 11...so sent them out to their bus stops with Eng Chang and waited for bus till all gone then returned home..yupx..

The movie really strengthens me i think...yupx..she's a strong believer...being possesed by so many demons...6 of them...including Judas...and the most powerfull Lucifer..she willingly suffered...so tt more ppl will come to know god..

The trial against the father who conducter exorcism on her eventually found guilty on the charge of indirect homacide...but the Jury suggested tt his sentense served...tt means he was free..great testimony of God...really..and a battle won spiritually....i really wan to visit her grave....she's a brave warrior of god...I know she's in heaven now..yes..

In real life demons do attack..though not possess me but do attack me b4..made me feel lousy...feel worthless..feel so wrong..feel like dying..but no he can't win..i know i will live on and serve God..and i challenge you evil!!that in this war...God will never be the one losing at the then...even though now it seems like you reign...you will face ur doom back in hell when Jesus returns and judges you!!!BURN IN HELL!!!

2006-05-03T07:34:00.000-07:00

Gosh..i dunno why...really dunno why i still got the mood to liek BLOG!!!when here..i still ahve gases tutorial to do!!and i seriously catch no ball!!!!

see...lack of physics background...land me in this pathetic state...

i see and hear many ppl complaining they regret coming into JC....cos the life here is just so so sooooo tiring..cca...long days...and u get home u are just dead..and u know what..in jc...coming home from school is when ur real learning and work starts...weekend is your working day...weekdays are the days where ur entertainments are scattered around like stars on a cloudy night...(does any one get the metaphor any way??)

Once i heard junkwang saying when i was asking yi ze about Poly life...and kwnag said this to me..."when u know how poly is like..you will realise tt the biggest regret u made is going to JC.." lolx...

I dunno why...it's sorta true..when u know Poly life is like so....free and easy..but i belief whatever institution it is..with no work u can't stay..

Personally i never regret coming into JC...coming to JC is to aim to go uni...simple as that..no way back..any way if poly i oso dunno what course to take..yar..and one major thing about JC tt really really keeps me going is friends here...

My class ppl are just all so nice...MJ is really like family...where u walk out...u see mj ppl...though u do not know them...a smile does not cost any one a thing and MJ ppl are never stingy with their smiles...

Though ppl may say oh..cos they are going through elections and so putting on the smile..but there are genuine smiles...tt are warm and true....

NO more childish ppl here...(maybe a tiny winy pinchy pit) but u see matured thinkings..repects and friendship...tt really rocks..

Like shuning..she said she never thought she would ever be friends with me..though she knew me since sec one bcos of pei en..actually me too..i din even know she exsisted till sec 3??lolx..ppl like yu quan..clarin..junkwang..ppl i barely talk to in AHS for 4 years are now able to make me open my hearts to them...it's amazing!!yar..so guys..whenver u think of giving up...think again..then smiling faces...the laughter and cheers!!!and keep going!!!and going..

I have a mission....of my own...tt i wanna shut some ppl up....some ppl owe me a apology...i demand it and will sure get it!!!watch it!!!WATCH IT!!!Larre's coming to getcha!!!KICKING YA ASS!!!

Yar and today...went to TM with Engchang after school to buy the blazer for music extrodinaire final...and last night..middle of the night my mom was sent to hospital...1 sth i received her sms...saying she had kidney stones and urethra and inflammation occuring at the same time..telling me to take care..what she wont be there to cook for me..and told me to take care of my step dad cos he's life skills is as good none..EQ.....below 50 i guess....so yar...

Well can tell they din leave ina hurry cos they had time to tidy the bed to better than mine...lolx..but hey..i am not happy tt my mom is gone okay???I know i sounded like ir eally hate her..but after all she's my mom...

So i called her in the morning..she said the doc haven give her x'ray yet...so after school i call again..she sounded weak..saying she jsut had the operation where by they shot the stones with lazer to pieces..small enough to be transported out of the body by faeces...so yar..guess all things are going fine..cos this isnt the first time this occured...sigh..God please heal her and be with her...

Well..she should be enjoying..cos she loves staying there...why??it's GLENEAGLES GUYS!!!!3 days fee is 6000 bucks!!!!(of course we get all the money back from insurance company)...it's as good as hotel..where u order ur food...every level there's an kitchen..with proper professionally training and dressed waiters delivering ur food covered by silver semispherical cover and accompanied by silver utencils...she said it's like a holiday there...come on mom..cut it...

Some times i really wish i can stay in hospital..just to see who will come and visit me...i think i will break down...if she comes..lolx..

So yar..any wayx..my mom sponsored my blazer..it cost quite a lumb..lolx...my mom only support me one thing really really genuinely...SINGING...hoping tt one day i can some how achieve her unachieved dream..she was just a step away...sigh..

another long blog..lolx..stupid junkwang..mentioned about dream...i had a dream last night..it was a sad one...no...a close to reality one..my dreams are always previews of future....in it..i cried...in front of eveyr one...cried..out of control...

Junkwang was right...some times..crying it out once and for all..really..will feel good...

2006-05-02T04:00:00.000-07:00

Hi Ppl...
blogging again..

Basically..today was filled with emotions...

Got school early and read about Gases...cos by right today was supposed to meet mr lau after school..but many couldnt make it due to cca so changed timing..yupx..

Then recess time went to library...decided to read some books from the lib..since i've not read anything from there yet other than year book...

Took out this comic...by Jimmy..tt walk left walk right...so many words..just suddenly brought back to the memories...those words...looks so familiar..."是突然迸发的热情让他们相遇" It's the sudden impulse of passion tt brought them together...and lines like"两条平行线也有相交的一天"there will be a day when 2 parallel lines meet and "握在手中的风筝也会突然短了线"the string of a kite in ur hand may break suddenly...

Once in our nicks..the sweet bits...just all haunts back...

Lunch time went to finish the book..really really sweet and the ending is a bit diff from the movie..but i thought the original one is better than the movie one..yupx..

Then when the rest are having chinese lesson..Shuning shiqi and me sat at canteen and chit chat while eating fries...shiqi did flag duty today..lolx think it's the school flag got problem..the flag was raised super and i mean SUPER slowly..lolx...singing national anthum half way wan wei started laughing..when the song ended the flag was still half way through lolx...but first time ma...so forgivable lar yar?lolx..

Then as we chat..then andrew and julian came over..they were decided on which song to choose for investiture...while i was pretty emotionally filled..though was putting on laughters with them...there was only one song resounding in me...the whole day.."Feng"...so i started singing again..

it's really an emotional song..not only makes me sad...shuning oso stops me from singing..andrew too..and asked me to sing another..so yar..sang "jie kou"....then andrew let me hear "nan ren hai yang"...really really sad...

Then really really make me feel even lower...jus tlow..then junkwang and yuquan came..now great..the 4 lonely and sad ditched gang is united..and kwang and me started listening to all the sad songs....his eyes were red...and he kept saying i cried...i din....really.....never bluff

Yar just all the sad songs...it's really the first time i share this kinda emotions with guys...a bit weird..esp after reading tt stupid coli and kero's blog...YUCK!!!

but we talked about how we felt...

Some times...when u think back u really regret some things u did or haven did...some things u din say to her...and some things tt u said to her...

Does she even know...will she ever knows?

this are some songs we heard today..one at a time..it's from westlife..i really remember times when i hear those songs and really tears just come out of control...

WESTLIFE
I Cry
You said goodbye I fell apart
I fell from all we had
To I never knew I needed you so bad

You need to let things go
I know, you told me so
I've been through hell To break the spell

Why did I ever let you slip away
Can't stand another day without you
Without the feeling I once knew

I cry silently
I cry inside of me
I cry hopelessly
Cause I know I'll never breathe your love again

I cry Cause you're not here with me
I cry
Cause I'm lonely as can be
I cry hopelessly
Cause I know I'll never breathe your love again

If you could see me now
You would know just how
How hard I try
Not to wonder why

I wish I could believe in something new
Oh please somebody tell me it's not true (oh girl)
I'll never be over you

Why did I ever let you slip away
Can't stand another day without you
Without the feeling I once knew

I cry silently
I cry inside of me
I cry hopelessly
Cause I know I'll never breathe your love again
I cry
Cause you're not here with me
I cry Cause I'm lonely as can be
I cry hopelessly
Cause I know I'll never
breathe your love again

If I could have you back tomorrow
If I could lose the pain and sorrow
I would do just anything
To make you see You still love me

WE 2 really just sat there and listen and sang..and stone...holding back our emotions...tan,ser min they all walked here kept saying this 2 shi lian de nan ren...then ah tan gave kwang a pack of tissue..lolx..we din cry lar liew..lolx...

Sad day..sad life...sad...sad sad...

2006-04-29T04:11:00.002-07:00

Fed up..i typed like bloody long and just because clicked on spelling check...
the whole thing just GONE...
Wtf..

any way..hi guys...sorry to begin in tt way but it just spoilt my mood like totally!?

Yar so hey i finally set up a blog now..and from now i on i think i will just blog here so tt ppl may tag(or so i hope?) yar..basically this is just a new blog set up from an old account...it's been like centuries since i last set up a blog..so suddenly like a noob in this now....took me so long..

So yar..actually last night was doing on this and my mom called me telling me tt she's lazy to cook so asked me to go out and eat...later realising tt it was with her friends tt i dun really wanna be with...(So in another word i got scammed..)watever...so we went to Pasir Ris beach there to eat again...though again but I SWEAR I WILL BRING MY FUTURE GF HERE TO EAT SUPPER OR STH COS IT'S JSUT SO SO SOOO ROMANTIC...you know..under the moon light...sea breeze and so quiet...playing some oldies like "Nothing's gonna change my love for you" and "What I gotta do to make you love me"it's jsut so sweet and romantic..but IT WAS WITH THE WRONG PPL!!!so yar i will work hard and quickly get my license..so tt i can drive my gf there...have supper...like what i saw last night...this young couple..should be married...bringing their Husky there..eat chicken wing..so sweet...yar SO LARRE YOUR SHORT TERM GOAL IS GET THROUGH MID YEAR AND GET UR STUPID LICENSE WHICH IS LIKE A YEAR LATE ALREADY!!!??yar and long term will be getting my own car..driving her there in my own Impreza or Evo or sth...then eat there..chit chat then go walk along the sandy beach and drive her home...yupx...I PROMISE!!!whoever you may be...

Yar so we ate..like crap a lot lar..then i dunno why..5 of us and they ordered 6 bottles of tiger beer....so i had to finish 2....so finish a bit giddy...i think i am experienced enough to make sure i dun get drunk..yar...i drank coconut in between the 2 bottles so to make sure i dun get drunk..and the moment i realised i can't see things sharp enough i used ice water to wash face and pat arms...lolx..

Then i was so bored cos they were liek talking about election so i smsed Cindy saying i think i was drunk..she replied with a lil "!"..then gave me a miss call..indicating tt i should call her back...so call back...she wasnt angry just tt she realised tt her sms BURST...until like today??lolx..dumb dumb..burst le still waste sms with one "!"..lolx

Yar then talked a lot of rubbish until she wanna go study le..so yar got home and continued working on this blog..took a lot time lar cos i had 4 blogskins to decide on..which is why i hate shopping..it's never easy to make up my mind...fine i admit i am a woman in this sense ok!?GENDER EQUALITY GUYS!!!

So yar 12 sth 1 sth Kael talked to me on msn asking me if i wanna go church with her tml..sure why not!!!then she went on to elaberate on her this huge crush on this guy in her school..lolx lame..

Yar so today woke up at 7.30 then went Tamp Interchange mac to meet ming zhi, Eugene,Jennifer and Anna for PW...made a minor pregress ba..then i had to go church le...Met kael at around 12.50..she kept bringing the time forward...confused me like hell..lolx..then we went to eat BK...2 consecutive meals of fastfood..sigh...yar..eat and talk about her crush and apple..talk and talk then went to Hall 9 of Expo then met up with win win and pamela....

they 2 so sweet lar..some more remembering the times like double date and stuff...sigh...then kael was like..nvm lar treat me as ur stead lar...lolx thanks pal...she wa slike relax i've been single for my whole life...please girl you chose not to get attached ok??lolx...but we are just too good friends to be in BGR lar...lolx...pure friendship yupx..lolx..

Then after tt she was supposed to meet her faculty(dunno why HCI dun call houses HOUSES but faculty) and they having this faculty outing after their amazing race...imagine..1/4 of the school population outing...!!!!Hwachong ppl no need study one..all smart....she wanted to go home and change but was told to wear smart casual..so nvm no need le so went with me to Tamp to do some window shopping for clothes cos yan hong mentioned about costume for Music Extrodinair so had to go see what to wear..she wanted white thoroughly..like Campus Superstar so went to see see lor...yar...then after tt Kael's meeting time oso got brought forward..so since she had like no idea how to get to Downtown east fromt here i sent her there...then on the way my mom called to ask where was i if i need her to fetch me(recently she very nice to me...duno why...must look around for broken things already lolx)so ok lor..told her to go do her stuff then call me...

Yar then since got time to wait for her went to the Arcade there to see if can play initial D(it's been years since i last smelled it..) but it's occupied...but as i was waiting...Willin Weisheng and Yong Ping came..they were playing there..i was like OI!!YOU 3 NO NEED STUDY AH!!!MID YEAR NOW LEH!!LATER U 3 NEVER GET GOOD RESULT U 3 DIE FIRST!!!lolx..then they smile smile...then wanted to challenge me Initial D and basically the one playing it is a loser..paly then play lar..shout shout shout for wad...then smack the machine some more..hate this kind of ppl lor....think they damn pro..a bit glitch then hit the machine..hello!!!8000 over US$ each leh u pay ah!!!???LOSER!!so never play lor..went to see willie and yong ping play soccer...lolx willie won...then when palying with another group..i left half way when willie was leading...yupx!!good job boy but must study!!lolx

Then my mom called me to hurry me..like there was a girl injured inside and the Civil Defence personels were there to carry her out lar..lolx...how to go out..

Fetch me le go fetch my bro and his gf who were shopping for groceries to cook..like now??please..he can't cook but to follow stupid instructions and they are now making big mess in side the kitchen(oops will he get to read this??lolx shh)and dunno why my mom's students this pair of brother sister from Ngee Ann and Tampines Sec came over to do work..and play..and my mom asked me to go out and give the sec 3 girl ting xie..like RANDOM LAR!!!

But still i think it's sweet..and bring back all the memories again..cos i wanted to bring her back to cook and she wanted to taste my cookings too...well..sigh...now i like alone blog lor..dun go be dian deng pao...sigh...

Now her student is obviously not studying...singing chanting and walking around outside..reminds me of tt stupid tuition i used to go....

He's now calling back a student whom he chased and dispised against..cos he's results are now striving...and obviously he wanna claim the credit so he wants him back..and make use of him to advertise for him...loser...WHAT A LOSER!!!and how will he cover for himself??oh no wad..cos i see tt he knos how to study on his own so i encourage him to come back...wtf...shut up with ur childish and stupid excuses lar..not every one's mind so simple ok!!!???what goes around comes around...what awaits u in the future can't be tt bright....cos GOD IS FAIR!!!

My arm hurts now...dunno why...heck..haha...dun care..now 10 minutes le so i have to go out and give ting xie....sian diao....